Shall I tell you the Football Joke about Chelsea?

I know this is true because it was told to me by a Queen's Council.

It was the last game of the season. Chelsea had to win to stay up.

They lost.

Yon football thug kicked a Policeman in the shin in frustration. Ended up in Court.

"Your Honour", quoth he, "we was going down."

"And so are you, young man. Two Years."