View Full Version : Balderdash and Piffle - (something trivial)
Maybe they thought she was going to start a bun-fight?
The Grand Wazoo
22-01-2012, 19:24
Sunday nights have never been the same since they stopped showing 'The Clangers' after my bath-time.
HArUmqqiL0s
Sunday nights have never been the same since they stopped showing 'The Clangers' after my bath-time.
HArUmqqiL0s
My mother worked with Oliver Postgate in the Air Ministry during the war. For such an imaginative person (he created 'Noggin the Nog' and 'Bagpuss' amongst others), it was a travesty he was never knighted!
He was a national treasure.
Why does the 'statistics' bar at the bottom of the title page always say there is one more member logged on than those named?
Who is this mystery member? Are they the 'ghost in the machine'?
Why do I get bored late at night and worry about these things?
Bugger - Now the numbers tally!
The Grand Wazoo
26-01-2012, 00:54
Bad ghost, naughty ghost!
Tonight's claret must've been particularly good, Barry!! :drunk: :eyebrows:
Marco.
The Vinyl Adventure
26-01-2012, 07:50
Can anyone explain how and why the 'hair of the dog' works?
I saw on the tele once that it is because they are 2 things that need to be processed by the liver
1 is easy to process, the other is harder. The hard one is processed after the easy one. Whilst the hard one is being processed you feel crap
You wake up in the morning and you body is processing the hard one you feel crap
Sometimes you wake up and feel fine your body is processin the easy one still
You drink more and feel fine because you start processing the easy one again ...
The easy one is always processed first as it is worst for you ...
I don't know how true that is, I saw it on the tv ... And after all seeing is not always believing!
Tonight's claret must've been particularly good, Barry!! :drunk: :eyebrows:
Marco.
Confound you Sir - I am perfectly sober, having an alcohol free day!
It's not the first time I have noticed this 'effect'. At the moment it says "Currently active users: 92 (23 members + 69 guests)", yet only 22 members are named!
It's doing this just to upset me!! :confused:
Confound you Sir - I am perfectly sober, having an alcohol free day!
It's not the first time I have noticed this 'effect'. At the moment it says "Currently active users: 92 (23 members + 69 guests)", yet only 22 members are named!
It's doing this just to upset me!! :confused:
Barry - Under "User CP" -> "Edit Options" users have the choice to "Use Invisible Mode" - "Invisible mode allows you to browse the forums without appearing in the 'Currently Active Users' lists."
However, I suspect they would still be included in the tally for "Active Users" - just not the list - hence why the numbers didn't agree.
jazzpiano
29-01-2012, 04:02
My favorite post of all - Clangers. Therapy. Off the wall. Spontaneous.
The Grand Wazoo
29-01-2012, 11:36
When I went to school, a billion was a million million.
Now it's only a thousand million.
The Americans have stolen our zeros - can we 'ave 'em back please?
DanJennings
01-02-2012, 06:58
When I went to school, a billion was a million million.
Now it's only a thousand million.
The Americans have stolen our zeros - can we 'ave 'em back please?
That intrigued me, so I did a big of digging:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Long_and_short_scales
That intrigued me, so I did a big of digging:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Long_and_short_scales
So it seems our Chris is stuck in 1974, which by all accounts is a good place to be for at least one other of our members. :) Here's me in about 1974 - I think I'd like to go back to those times too.
The Grand Wazoo
01-02-2012, 17:59
I was taught about this long after 1974.
From yer Wikki:
Although some residual usage of the long scale continues in the UK, the phrases British usage and American usage are no longer accurate characterisations. Usage of the two systems can be a subject of controversy. Differences in opinion as to which system should be used can evoke resentment between adherents, while national differences of any kind can acquire jingoistic overtones.
I suppose my maths teacher was guilty of the residual usage. And he obviously gave me my jingoistic overtones!
But then I was also taught to say 'maths' & not 'math'!!
Stratmangler
01-02-2012, 19:31
So it seems our Chris is stuck in 1974, which by all accounts is a good place to be for at least one other of our members. :) Here's me in about 1974 - I think I'd like to go back to those times too.
Think you'll find it's 1973 ;)
Took some old IT kit to the tip this afternoon - there was a pair of B&W 600 floorstanders in the "Small Appliances" section - looked to be in good nick and complete - of course the answer as to if I could take them home in return for a small donation to a favourite charity was "no, sorry, not allowed" :rolleyes:
I just hope they recycle this sort of thing and not just send it to landfill...
The Grand Wazoo
02-02-2012, 00:39
Please, please tell me I'm not going mad & it's just everyone else who's crazy:
Builder forced to design estate around rock.. because locals say fairies live under it
Feb 22 2010 By James Moncur
A BUILDER was forced to design a luxury estate around a rock - because locals said fairies lived under it.
Work on the multi-million pound development ground to a halt when villagers complained that the fairies would be "upset".
Marcus Salter, of Genesis Properties, estimates the colony of fairies believed to be under the rock in St Fillans, Perthshire, has cost him £15,000.
He said he first noticed possible problems when his diggers moved on to the site outside the village.
He said: "A neighbour came over shouting, 'Don't move that rock. You'll kill the fairies.' Then we got a series of phone calls, saying we were disturbing the fairies. I thought they were joking. It didn't go down very well."
The bemused builder then went to a meeting with the community council, where chairman Jeannie Fox told him: "I do believe in fairies but I can't be sure that they live under that rock.
"There are a lot of superstitions going about up here and people do believe things like standing stones and large rocks should never be moved."
The new development now centres on a small park with the "fairy" rock in the middle.
The Planning Inspectorate have no guidelines on fairies but a spokesman said: "Local customs and beliefs must be taken into account when applying for planning permission."
http://www.dailyrecord.co.uk/news/weird-news/2010/02/22/builder-forced-to-design-estate-around-rock-because-locals-say-fairies-live-under-it-86908-22060882/
http://www.ssqgroup.com/cms/getpdf.asp?id=10&Field=PDF
http://www.holdthefrontpage.co.uk/wp-content/uploads/headgirl.jpg
:eyebrows:
I'm not sure where this is going - fairies and head...? :scratch:
And now for something completely different...
Has anyone ever pulled the "Emergency Alarm" on a train? "Pull the red handle to stop the train" is almost too good to resist - every time I travel by rail I want to pull that handle! Is it really connected directly to the brakes? If you pull it, does the train really stop, and is it instant? These questions need to be answered!
DanJennings
04-02-2012, 11:50
I'm not sure where this is going - fairies and head...? :scratch:
And now for something completely different...
Has anyone ever pulled the "Emergency Alarm" on a train? "Pull the red handle to stop the train" is almost too good to resist - every time I travel by rail I want to pull that handle! Is it really connected directly to the brakes? If you pull it, does the train really stop, and is it instant? These questions need to be answered!
Now I have an amusing story about this from a few years ago.
Me and a couple of mates went to see a band in Nottingham and for a bit of a drunken weekend. We went on the train, and my friend had to use the toilet. My other friend noticed with great delight that it was one of those toilets with a sliding door operated electronically with a button and a similar locking system, and also that my friend had neglected to lock it.
The train was very crowded, and there was a group of young women sat on the floor outside the toilet door. Naturally my friend pushed the button, exposing my other friend having a piss, cue much merriment for us, surprise for the group of young women and horror for my friend using the toilet. We did this a number of times because he couldn't figure out how to lock the toilet door, and in a blind panic my friend pushed the emergency button by accident.
The train did indeed stop, although I can't testify to whether it was instant or not. The driver came along to see if my friend was in trouble, and we just pushed the toilet door button again to let the driver in while my friend was still using the facilities. So there's your answer!
I should probably have checked Wikipedia (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Emergency_brake_(train)) but your story was much more fun - cheers Dan. :)
Pulling the alarm chain on a British train will pull a lever connected to the brake pipe flaps. Pulling the alarm activates a piston, causing the flaps to be opened and all the air pushed out the air tube, forcing the brakes on. In the driver's cab, a buzzer and a light will tell that the alarm has been activated. In the guard's van, this is seen from a valve which shows loss of pressure in the brake pipe. In the UK, there is a fine of £25 for pulling the alarm chain without good reason.
DanJennings
04-02-2012, 12:00
My friend didn't get fined £25, so having two drunk mates repeatedly exposing your penis to other passengers must count as a good reason!
The Grand Wazoo
02-03-2012, 08:27
I gave the dog his early morning walk as usual before breakfast today. As he was dragging me down a narrow lane, I heard some voices coming from the other side of the hedge:
"I'll raise you ten"
"See your ten and raise you fifty"
"I'm out"
"Read 'em and weep!"
Then I realised that Spring must have come to Lancashire because what I was hearing was lambs gambolling in the fields.
The Vinyl Adventure
04-03-2012, 22:45
hahaha!
Yes, the Zarzleberry bush (pronounced in a West Country accent) is my very own creation!
And now it is there for Google to find it. I wonder how long that will take?
It now appears twice here on aos
Once on my place (thought I would experiment)
But oddly, also on another forum ... Randomly at the beginning of a post ...
The Grand Wazoo
04-03-2012, 22:49
Where's that then?
The Vinyl Adventure
04-03-2012, 22:54
http://bit.ly/yHOMxz
The Grand Wazoo
04-03-2012, 23:20
Hamish - weird!
The Vinyl Adventure
04-03-2012, 23:35
Agreed!
There is no context whatsoever!!
To top it off it's above my post in the listings, which frankly, considering the context is just not cricket!
Rare Bird
12-03-2012, 13:54
I was looking at activity this morning & noticed a Guest 'Sending Forum Feedback' whats this then anyone?
The Grand Wazoo
27-03-2012, 23:41
That letter seems to be tak*ng over the world............and now *t's t*me to f*ght back! So to redress the balance just a teeny b*t, there follows some *nformat*on about the benef*ts of Apple products w*thout a s*ngle 'one of those' anywhere.
Nutr*t*onal Benef*ts of Apple Products
Apple Products: Better Than Ever
Qu*etly v*rtuous
The nutr*t*onal benef*ts of apple ju*ce (as well as applesauce and many other apple products) are often underest*mated because these foods are "qu*etly v*rtuous." When closely evaluat*ng the nutr*t*onal compos*t*on of apple ju*ce and other apple products, *t becomes apparent that the lack of fat, cholesterol and sod*um are just a few of the many reasons these products are an *mportant part of a healthful d*etary reg*men.
Full of phytonutr*ents
Research stud*es around the world are now uncover*ng the w*de array of phytonutr*ents that are conta*ned *n fru*ts and vegetables that make them an *mportant part of a nutr*t*ous d*et. These nutr*ents offer many benef*ts, not unl*ke the ant*ox*dants we hear so much about. *n fact, un*vers*ty research (see research stud*es l*sted below) *s just now f*nd*ng that apple ju*ce conta*ns the same *mportant phytonutr*ents as whole apples. These nutr*ents are why ju*ce d*rectly from the fru*t, such as 100% apple ju*ce, offers many of the natural nutr*t*on benef*ts. To learn more about th*s research, cl*ck here.
Read*ly accepted source of energy and essent*al flu*ds
Fru*t sugars such as those found *n apple products serve as an *mmed*ate source of energy. And because apple products taste so good, they are loved by consumers of all ages. Apple ju*ce also serves as an excellent means of prov*d*ng essent*al flu*ds to the body, and *s unl*kely to cause allerg*c react*ons.
Fru*t Exchange
Apple products have a nutr*ent/calor*e rat*o super*or to many of the alternat*ve snacks be*ng consumed by ch*ldren. One serv*ng of apple ju*ce (4-6 ounces) or unsweetened applesauce (1/2 cup) serves as a fru*t exchange, accord*ng to the meal plann*ng gu*del*nes publ*shed jo*ntly by the Amer*can D*etet*c Assoc*at*on and Amer*can D*abetes Assoc*at*on. The 2005 D*etary Gu*del*nes for Amer*cans recommend consumpt*on of several cups per day of fru*ts and vegetables, and acknowledge the role that 100% ju*ce can play as part of the fru*t allowance. The new USDA MyPyram*d food gu*dance program l*sts port*on s*zes and amounts of 100% ju*ce for ch*ldren and adults.
*n keep*ng w*th recent health profess*onals' recommendat*ons to *ncrease serv*ngs of fru*ts and vegetables and reduce the amount of fat *n the d*et, apple products can make an *mportant contr*but*on to a well-balanced d*et.
Most ped*atr*c*ans support apple ju*ce as the f*rst ju*ce for *nfants
A recent nat*onal survey of ped*atr*c health profess*onals conf*rmed that apple ju*ce *s most often recommended as the f*rst ju*ce for *nfants. *t *s eas*ly accepted and pleas*ng to *nfants. Also, s*nce bab*es love the sweet taste of apple ju*ce, *t may help mot*vate them to use a standard cup or glass and accept new tastes and foods. The Amer*can Academy of Ped*atr*cs recommends 4-6 ounces for ch*ldren 1-6 years old and 8-12 for older ch*ldren. Ju*ce should only be served from a cup or glass, not *n a bottle.
Ch*ldren and adults al*ke love apple ju*ce
*nformat*on gathered *n consumer focus groups demonstrates that apple ju*ce *s a taste that both ch*ldren and adults enjoy. However, 100% fru*t ju*ce l*ke apple ju*ce often *s not selected because of the advert*s*ng hype g*ven to popular beverage alternat*ves. Apple ju*ce *s versat*le and can be served ch*lled, over *ce, frozen *nto fru*t pops or even served hot. Too many t*mes, grade schoolers and teenagers forget how much they l*ke apple ju*ce because no one br*ngs *t home from the store.
Source: Apple Products Research & Educat*on Counc*l (http://www.appleproducts.org/index.html)
DanJennings
14-04-2012, 07:15
I finally got confirmation yesterday that I am officially moving house.
Moving from a 1 bedroom flat to a 3 bedroom house with a garden! I'm a bit excited.
Got lots of packing to do now, I'm moving in on Friday!
I finally got confirmation yesterday that I am officially moving house.
Moving from a 1 bedroom flat to a 3 bedroom house with a garden! I'm a bit excited.
Got lots of packing to do now, I'm moving in on Friday!
Cool! What is the new listening room like? :eyebrows:
DanJennings
14-04-2012, 16:21
Cool! What is the new listening room like? :eyebrows:
massive, laminate floor, I'm not sure how I'm going to arrange everything yet, but I have the week off after the move in date, so I shall have plenty of time to experiment. There may even be pics. :eyebrows:
Just had to pack all my CDs and records away, room is looking a bit cluttered with boxes!
The Grand Wazoo
14-04-2012, 18:02
Why can't I buy dark German mustard any more?
I even went to the Colemans shop in Norwich a couple of years ago & they didn't have any there.
I used to have waffles for breakfast - the frozen ones shipped from America, don't remember the brand but the packaging was red & blue. Can't get them anywhere now it's all the fresh doughey Belgian things - got rid of my freezer - no point in it anymore :(
Why are my jobbies a different shape on a Tuesday?
Marco.
Why are my jobbies a different shape on a Tuesday?
Marco.
There's a moon up in the sky/
It's called The Moon
It's because of that...
I won't comment,see for your self. http://jalopnik.com/5902066/this-is-the-weirdest-jaguar-e+type-weve-ever-seen/gallery/1?popular=true
I note with amusement that our latest (6104th) member has the same forum name as one of the founder members. :doh:
What's been going on behind that 'little white door' in Wrexham? Could this be the (un)reported first human cloning? Will this clone turn out to use a Technics turntable and Tannoy speakers? :scratch:
Stay tuned for the next instalment of "I was a mutant audiophile-clone from the planet Rex-M". :eek:
The clone is still out there! - Be afraid, be very afraid!
What will happen if the two meet? Will they mutually annihilate one another in a burst of gamma rays? In a parallel universe is Marco's clone the original and it's Marco that is the clone?
Will we ever know?
It might explain how Marco has clocked up over 30,000 posts.
The Grand Wazoo
08-05-2012, 07:44
According to my old Concise Oxford Dictionary, the word 'ruckus' has no meaning unless it's followed by 'rumpus'.
Indeed. Rather like 'rumpy' means nothing, without being followed by 'pumpy'.
Marco.
http://a1.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/401696_10150960054024283_701819282_11973783_205175 9586_n.jpg
Notice anything strange?
The Vinyl Adventure
13-05-2012, 21:34
Haha ... Did you see this one
http://cdn.24.co.za/files/Cms/General/d/1488/dd244b0a09c34cbfae8efda13acc6e45.jpg
Reid Malenfant
13-05-2012, 21:35
http://a1.sphotos.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-ash4/401696_10150960054024283_701819282_11973783_205175 9586_n.jpg
Notice anything strange?
Ohhhh, the bloke has two right arms :D No wonder his Mrs is grinning like a cat that got the cream :rfl:
Haha ... Did you see this one
http://cdn.24.co.za/files/Cms/General/d/1488/dd244b0a09c34cbfae8efda13acc6e45.jpg
:scratch:
The Vinyl Adventure
13-05-2012, 22:16
fingers
Reid Malenfant
13-05-2012, 22:22
fingers
Now I'm confused to :scratch:
:eyebrows:
Wassup with them? You can't see them all?
The Vinyl Adventure
13-05-2012, 22:26
they dissolve into her back ...
The Vinyl Adventure
13-05-2012, 22:27
http://l2.yimg.com/bt/api/res/1.2/zRXWIatnJ2SOf2oowH0qdw--/YXBwaWQ9eW5ld3M7cT04NTt3PTYwMA--/http://media.zenfs.com/401/2011/08/16/kate2_121617.jpg
Reid Malenfant
13-05-2012, 22:28
So she's a hugger, & a close one :eyebrows:
The Vinyl Adventure
28-06-2012, 21:27
Headphones are a bit like motorbikes
Higher performance for less money but you can only really enjoy them by your self ...
Just a passing observation ...
The Grand Wazoo
13-07-2012, 03:45
Sleep is over-rated
Sleep is over-rated
Really? Not in this house it isn't! :lol:
The Grand Wazoo
14-07-2012, 18:38
Yeah, I was trying to fool myself into thinking that there was a good reason for being on AoS at 4:45am!
Stratmangler
01-08-2012, 01:37
Just been tracking a parcel delivery status online, and found this word "sortation".
Now I understand what it means, but WTF invents bollocks terms such as this? :scratch:
Just been tracking a parcel delivery status online, and found this word "sortation".
Now I understand what it means, but WTF invents bollocks terms such as this? :scratch:
Our American cousins do enjoy adding to the language in their own inimitable way...;)
The Grand Wazoo
01-08-2012, 17:12
Yeah, they're the causation of it.
Although our dog is smarter than your average pooch in most things, she will insist on negotiating her way down the stairs with her tail firmly in her gob when she is excited. Obviously this results in a tumble down the stairs more often than not. You'd think she'd learn... :scratch:
Out of a membership of 6,774 there are
58 members with > 1,000 posts
32 members with > 2,000 posts
21 members with > 3,000 posts
13 members with > 4,000 posts
12 members with > 5,000 posts
11 members with > 6,000 posts
8 members with > 7,000 posts
8 members with > 8,000 posts
6 members with > 9,000 posts
6 members with > 10,000 posts
and
1 member with > 30,000 posts.
On the plus side there are only 71 members who have made no posts at all!
The Grand Wazoo
26-09-2012, 23:46
What is an occasional table when it's not being a table?
The Vinyl Adventure
27-09-2012, 16:22
What is an occasional table when it's not being a table?
a waste of space
talking of space... How do you fancy a 23 mile sky-dive from the edge of it... :eek:
http://www.engadget.com/2012/10/05/leap-of-faith-felix-baumgartners-historic-jump-from-the-edge/
The Grand Wazoo
06-10-2012, 11:13
I can think of cheaper ways to soil my pants!
DanJennings
08-10-2012, 17:49
talking of space... How do you fancy a 23 mile sky-dive from the edge of it... :eek:
http://www.engadget.com/2012/10/05/leap-of-faith-felix-baumgartners-historic-jump-from-the-edge/
That guy is insane, best of luck to him.... I'll be watching that website with interest, cheers for that link
I had to pay a whole 36p (30p +VAT) to enter Lincolnshire from Nottinghamshire on the A57 yesterday, by using the Dunham Toll Bridge - http://dunhambridge.co.uk/index.htm - the guy collecting the charge was the most cheerful fella I ever met - either the best job in the world, or actually he just stuck a shed by the side of the road and started collecting everyone's 36p's...? :)
Reid Malenfant
13-10-2012, 21:14
talking of space... How do you fancy a 23 mile sky-dive from the edge of it... :eek:
http://www.engadget.com/2012/10/05/leap-of-faith-felix-baumgartners-historic-jump-from-the-edge/
I'd do it, I'd even pay to do it :D
What an experience!
Just remember, you only live once ;)
brian2957
13-10-2012, 21:24
I had to pay a whole 36p (30p +VAT) to enter Lincolnshire from Nottinghamshire on the A57 yesterday, by using the Dunham Toll Bridge - http://dunhambridge.co.uk/index.htm - the guy collecting the charge was the most cheerful fella I ever met - either the best job in the world, or actually he just stuck a shed by the side of the road and started collecting everyone's 36p's...? :)
I had to pay 30p to enter Glasgow's Queen St. station toilets the other day . Piss poor value for money IMO :rolleyes:
Rare Bird
13-10-2012, 21:43
Im suprised they don't fit coin slots on the khazi door, extra for a crap!
Stratmangler
13-10-2012, 21:49
I had to pay 30p to enter Glasgow's Queen St. station toilets the other day . Piss poor value for money IMO :rolleyes:
You could have exercised your right to place your left hand upon the rear offside quarter of a patrol car and relieve yourself upon that wheel of the vehicle :eyebrows:
brian2957
13-10-2012, 21:54
Im suprised they don't fit coin slots on the khazi door, extra for a crap!
It was a real shit-hole too Andre .:lol:
brian2957
13-10-2012, 21:57
You could have exercised your right to place your left hand upon the rear offside quarter of a patrol car and relieve yourself upon that wheel of the vehicle :eyebrows:
Nah , couldn't pull my zip up with my hands handcuffed behind my back mate.:doh:
Stratmangler
13-10-2012, 22:28
Nah , couldn't pull my zip up with my hands handcuffed behind my back mate.:doh:
Fair point - I know it's still there in English law, but North of the border it might be a different matter....:eyebrows:
brian2957
13-10-2012, 22:46
Try it and let us know how you get on chris.
Stratmangler
13-10-2012, 22:59
Try it and let us know how you get on chris.
Just been having a little look around the 'net, and the law was repealed in 1976.
So it's helmets behind closed doors whenever possible ;)
The Grand Wazoo
16-10-2012, 18:09
I had to pay a whole 36p (30p +VAT) to enter Lincolnshire from Nottinghamshire on the A57 yesterday, by using the Dunham Toll Bridge -
Excellent! I used to live near Retford & used that little old bridge a lot. There was also a rickety old wooden one somewhere in Yorkshire that cost 5p or something silly.
One of the interesting things about life in the 21st century is that it is increasingly moving beyond parody.
For example -Take this piece about Pippa Middleton's new party planner book:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/books/booknews/9686086/Pippa-Middleton-book-number-one-in-Kensington-and-Chelsea-as-friends-rally-round.html
I particularly liked this:
A third tongue in cheek reader, more in line with British reviewers, said the book was "basically advice for people who are at that stage after a serious brain injury where they know how to walk and talk again but can't remember how to do normal, everyday things."
The Vinyl Adventure
18-11-2012, 12:21
One of the interesting things about life in the 21st century is that it is increasingly moving beyond parody.
For example -Take this piece about Pippa Middleton's new party planner book:
http://www.telegraph.co.uk/culture/books/booknews/9686086/Pippa-Middleton-book-number-one-in-Kensington-and-Chelsea-as-friends-rally-round.html
I particularly liked this:
A third tongue in cheek reader, more in line with British reviewers, said the book was "basically advice for people who are at that stage after a serious brain injury where they know how to walk and talk again but can't remember how to do normal, everyday things."
Brilliant ...
A niche audience, but an audience non the less ...
I love the description of pass the parcel ...
DanJennings
18-11-2012, 12:32
I love this pisstake twitter page:
https://twitter.com/Pippatips/ (https://twitter.com/Pippatips/...)
'the juice of an orange can be used as a refreshing & nutritious drink. You can get it from oranges or ready made in cartons'
'as it's Friday your boss may let you go home early, simply ask her or him via e-mail, phone or face'
'a haircut is a great way to deal with over-grown or untidy hair. Hair salons & barbers can do this for you in exchange for money'
The Vinyl Adventure
18-11-2012, 13:01
Brilliant!
The Vinyl Adventure
18-11-2012, 13:01
23k followers ... Awesome!
That is really funny - reminds me of the VIZ 'Top Tips' coulmn.
Here is one that is genuinely from the book:
Pippa’s tips for decorating the Christmas tree
. “Avoid positioning your tree beside a radiator or fireplace, and make sure there are power sockets nearby (or use an extension cable) for the fairy lights.”
Spotted the first 'pavement pizza' of the season.
Didn't see who made it; but he was no doubt, at the same time calling out to his two mates - "Hughie" and "Ralph".
Should I be proud or embarrassed to get a bottle of wine as a Christmas present from my local kebab shop? :lol:
Should I be proud or embarrassed to get a bottle of wine as a Christmas present from my local kebab shop? :lol:
Proud! They are obviously rewarding you for your custom! :eyebrows:
The Grand Wazoo
05-01-2013, 19:00
Is the process of taking down your Christmas decorations called a 'tinsel-ectomy'?
.........I just wondered!
Rare Bird
06-01-2013, 00:43
Wives that think they can lounge about on the Prog godz 1960's sofa :nono:
DanJennings
17-01-2013, 18:24
This lovely story has reaffirmed my faith in humanity for a while.
8 year old lad applies for vacant doncaster manager job invited for an interview (http://www.whoateallthepies.tv/football-league/153577/8-year-old-lad-applies-for-vacant-doncaster-manager-job-invited-for-an-interview.html)
:) I feel all warm and fluffy inside!
The following is one of those life-affirming stories that ought to put a smile on your face.
http://uk.news.yahoo.com/message-bottle-reunited-family-112628643.html
DanJennings
01-02-2013, 17:49
Anyone know anything about Port?
I've recently acquired a bottle of supposedly decent vintage port 'Quinto Le Noval' 1976...
Is it going to be any good? I'm not really a port drinker...
Anyone know anything about Port?
I've recently acquired a bottle of supposedly decent vintage port 'Quinto Le Noval' 1976...
Is it going to be any good? I'm not really a port drinker...
Have a look here: http://www.quintadonoval.com/ :)
New sign on the wall in the kitchen at work - 'Please use your own milk'
I pointed out to senior management that this was impossible for those members of staff who were incapable of lactating but my complaint fell on deaf ears.
greenhomeelectronics
10-03-2013, 09:41
Anyone know anything about Port?
I've recently acquired a bottle of supposedly decent vintage port 'Quinto Le Noval' 1976...
Is it going to be any good? I'm not really a port drinker...
I don't lknow much about port but if you send it to me I will drink it and let you know if it was any good or not. There is no charge for this service:cool:
Random photo posted on Facebook by my local record shop - I hope they use a Record Cleaning Machine before they go on the shelves! :eek:
http://sphotos-e.ak.fbcdn.net/hphotos-ak-snc6/269250_543399542346885_1554596418_n.jpg
DanJennings
11-04-2013, 17:36
right, here's another story from the world of football that reassures you that not everybody is all bad
link (http://www.whoateallthepies.tv/everton/162116/leighton-baines-personally-delivers-season-ticket-and-flowers-to-bereaved-everton-fan.html)
Very interesting short film of London in 1927 in colour - hard to believe this is 80 odd years ago - so little, yet so much - has changed.
http://vimeo.com/7638752#
What has happened to that ancient British tradition of ripping the pages out of grumble mags and placing them in the hedge at the bus stop. Or if there is no hedge then in the litter bin? I recall a time in the late seventies/ early eighties when one was more likely to remark on the absence of grumble at the bus stop than to point out its presence. Have standards slipped so much?
Probably not "something trivial" to the guy that just crash-landed in a garden, but I never even knew these safety systems existed - amazing!
http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/uk-england-gloucestershire-22798139
http://brsparachutes.com/sport_aircraft.aspx
CAwET3Q9Og4
This guy just made it out! :eek:
jgfG2DfPB6I
What has happened to that ancient British tradition of ripping the pages out of grumble mags and placing them in the hedge at the bus stop. Or if there is no hedge then in the litter bin? I recall a time in the late seventies/ early eighties when one was more likely to remark on the absence of grumble at the bus stop than to point out its presence. Have standards slipped so much?
What is a "grumble mag"? Or shouldn't I ask?
Just don't ask him about 'growlers'! :eyebrows:
Marco.
Allegedly genuine job application. So glad to see literacy standards are improving. Even worse that this was actually (apparently) sent by the career centre, so presumably had been checked over by a "professional" beforehand...
https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-prn1/1014297_10201291619070874_1542131399_n.jpg
ceejaydee
13-06-2013, 22:22
Bottle of Cobra to my left, a glass of Gentleman Jack to my right and Jessie Ware in the CD player - livin' a Thursday night like it's Friday :ner:
Bottle of Cobra to my left, a glass of Gentleman Jack to my right and Jessie Ware in the CD player - livin' a Thursday night like it's Friday :ner:
Becks Vier & Glen Moray here, Cheers! :cool:
ceejaydee
13-06-2013, 22:29
Becks Vier & Glen Moray here, Cheers! :cool:
:thumbsup:
...and several edits because it wasn't the first Cobra OR a pub measure of Jack :eyebrows:
Thursday has always been my nemesis. The weekend is tantalisingly close, so it would be rude not to. :)
ceejaydee
13-06-2013, 22:35
Thursday has always been my nemesis. The weekend is tantalisingly close, so it would be rude not to. :)
Oh indeed :)
As it would be rude to take a trip to Nottingham for work tomorrow without googling for a suitable record shop to visit whilst in the area :D
Thursday has always been my nemesis. The weekend is tantalisingly close, so it would be rude not to. :)
Was off work today (& tomorrow) - got so much leave accumulated I could take a day a week off till this time next year :eyebrows: May do some gardening tomorrow OR just spin some more tunes on the new (to me) CDP that arrived today...
On a separate note, I'd like to discuss the benefit of hindsight. For example, if I had said attribute, perhaps it wouldn't have been such a good idea to teach my four-year-old daughter to say "shut your cake-hole or I'll give you a knuckle-sandwich." Certainly that's the opinion of mother of the four-year-old after attending Parent's evening at Playgroup last night... :doh: :lol:
ceejaydee
13-06-2013, 22:55
On a separate note, I'd like to discuss the benefit of hindsight. For example, if I had said attribute, perhaps it wouldn't have been such a good idea to teach my four-year-old daughter to say "shut your cake-hole or I'll give you a knuckle-sandwich." Certainly that's the opinion of mother of the four-year-old after attending Parent's evening at Playgroup last night... :doh: :lol:
Hindsight eh... Our General Manager/sales manager/bean counter/jackofalltradesmasterofnone's favourite thing :eek:
Was at my seven year old niece's birthday after-party on Sunday and think my sister and brother-in-law would echo your comments on that :doh:
7 year olds have after parties!? :eek: Sh!t, I'm in for even more of a rude awakening than I was bargaining for! :lol:
ceejaydee
13-06-2013, 23:06
7 year olds have after parties!? :eek: Sh!t, I'm in for even more of a rude awakening than I was bargaining for! :lol:
Oh yes indeed..... For Uncles, Aunts and Grandparents too..... Alcohol & a BBQ may have been involved oh and some Barbie walking horse thing :scratch:
ceejaydee
13-06-2013, 23:08
Blimey... It is tomorrow :stalks:
You can keep the alcohol and BBQ - "Barbie walking horse thing" - now you're talking! :lol:
ceejaydee
13-06-2013, 23:11
;)
You can keep the alcohol and BBQ - "Barbie walking horse thing" - now you're talking! :lol:
Good thing that Ken was unavailable that particular day methinks.... Jodphurs do so little for a Gentleman
;)
Good thing that Ken was unavailable that particular day methinks.... Jodphurs do so little for a Gentleman
Depends if the gentleman is observing them being worn by a "barbie" or wearing them himself in my experience! :eyebrows: :lol:
ceejaydee
13-06-2013, 23:19
Depends if the gentleman is observing them being worn by a "barbie" or wearing them himself in my experience! :eyebrows: :lol:
:lol: I understand that the Gentleman in question does not really like hard rock but is always available to participate in a little AC/DC whatever that means :scratch:
Should have gone to Specsavers? :lol:
https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc3/988233_10152845873280640_1066752315_n.jpg
Just had to throw out an otherwise perfectly serviceable pair of Eddie Taylor boxer shorts because the elastic waistband had perished. I've only had them fifteen years. Is nothing made to last these days?:steam:
Well, I never knew until today that Charlie Chaplin was English, let alone "Sir Charles Chaplin" nor that he did "talkies" and that he was actually quite a political animal. Every day's a school day.
WibmcsEGLKo
With hindsight, perhaps this isn't the most appropriate thread, depending on your point of view I guess...
Should have gone to Specsavers? :lol:
https://fbcdn-sphotos-f-a.akamaihd.net/hphotos-ak-frc3/988233_10152845873280640_1066752315_n.jpg
Had to nick this and put it on Facebook I'm afraid Alex... brilliant, just brilliant :)
With hindsight, perhaps this isn't the most appropriate thread, depending on your point of view I guess...
Alex, I'm not sure whether you are simply gullible, thick, misguided or trying to wind us up? Surely you do not personally hold credibility in that link you posted. Please confirm it was a wind up.
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