Women Hifi owners...

[Pigmy Pony]

Yo, Piggurs... No thoughts on post 51?

Marco.

Not really - it appears me that we largely agree on all this, so all I can do is perhaps clarify one or two statements I made earlier.

Firstly, these "look at me" homes are I would say rather beyond yours or my budget, and so aren't really part of our world. They belong to the top 1%, footballers, performing artists, and those at the highest level in business. Their homes appear on TV programmes like "Through the Keyhole" and "Homes of the Rich and Famous". These homes' primary function is to wow onlookers, although even in these cases the men won't have much to do with the finer details of "making that house a home".

I stand by what I said about "nest builders" and "providers". I know there have been changes in the last 40 or so years, but largely it is still women who are more concerned with the finer details. It's not sexist of me to point at these differences - I'm not saying it's right or wrong, it just is. Certainly there will be exceptions, like your circumstances, and there is nothing wrong with that either.

Actually your domestic arrangements are quite similar to mine, except that Mrs. P is the one that stays at home. Nothing wrong with either set up, as it works for us, as it does for you and Del. The only difference is that you chose to retire early, whereas Anita, who is a few years younger than you, was forced to leave a job she really liked because of ill health. She is now still 15 years away from retirement age, but will never go out to work again.

I also stand by my comment about women having a good ear for hifi, but usually not giving a shit about it. Talk about youth being wasted on the young, good ears are wasted on most women. Except as somewhere to fix those big hoop ear rings, which make useful grab handles whenever she may be doing you a favour

I probably ruined my entire post with that last sentence, but I'll leave it in anyway.

[Joe]

I must be fundamentally incurious. I couldn't give a toss whether someone buys a new iPhone every week or still has the first mobile they ever bought, whether they live in a 'show home' or a shack, whether they clean that home meticulously or just let the dust gather, what car(s) they drive, or how much money they've got and how they spend it. I simply don't see those things as any of my business.

[struth]

It can be intimidating to visitors, who may well be disinclined to visit again.

indeed, as i was. she would ask me if i wanted to come in and i always had a good excuse ready. i just felt uncomfortable tbh. i was used to clean and tidy, but not to this level, but it was just her way, and she wanted showoffy about it.. just house proud, but it was just too much for a slob like me

[Marco]

I must be fundamentally incurious. I couldn't give a toss whether someone buys a new iPhone every week or still has the first mobile they ever bought, whether they live in a 'show home' or a shack, whether they clean that home meticulously or just let the dust gather, what car(s) they drive, or how much money they've got and how they spend it. I simply don't see those things as any of my business.

No, and I fully agree... *BUT* there's nothing wrong with making (valid) observations about human behaviour, how it has evolved through the decades, and criticising aspects of it now that you think aren't going in the right direction. It's a subject that interests me greatly.

So, you're missing the point. It's people's behaviour that fascinates me, not what they have or don't.

Marco.

[Marco]

If folk want to live in a "show home" its their choice. It wouldnt be mine; im far to lazy to achieve such level of neatness, and i'd be affraid to fart.
I know an old woman who did live a bit like that. Old stuff but all immaculate. polished floors you could shave in... Dust? not a spot.... It was quite intimidating tbh and to me very uncomfortable, but hey, it wasn't my home.

Yes it's their choice, and I fully respect that, but it's definitely a form of OCD... Plus, I don't think that the old woman you've mentioned would quite fit the demographic I'm referring to.

Like you say, she was just "house proud", which was common in people of her generation, as they would've likely grown up (in austerity during war times) having very little in terms of material possessions, and so when she was in a position later in life to be able to afford to buy some nice things, she sought to look after them and keep them in good condition.

Therefore, it would've been more about preserving things she'd worked very hard to get, and keep nice, than about showing off. Most folk from that era were house proud. I admire that. The materialistic 'show offs' I'm referring to these days, however, are a rather different breed!

Marco.

[Joe]

No, and I fully agree... *BUT* there's nothing wrong with making (valid) observations about human behaviour, how it has evolved through the decades, and criticising aspects of it now that you think aren't going in the right direction. It's a subject that interests me greatly.

So, you're missing the point. It's people's behaviour that fascinates me, not what they have or don't.

Marco.

OK, but there's nothing new about people defining themselves through their possessions (and sometimes living beyond their means in their attempts to outdo their neighbours); it's been going on for thousands of years. It's the type of possessions that have changed, rather than the type of behaviour.

[Marco]

Firstly, these "look at me" homes are I would say rather beyond yours or my budget, and so aren't really part of our world. They belong to the top 1%, footballers, performing artists, and those at the highest level in business. Their homes appear on TV programmes like "Through the Keyhole" and "Homes of the Rich and Famous". These homes' primary function is to wow onlookers, although even in these cases the men won't have much to do with the finer details of "making that house a home".

Interesting... Then we're talking about rather different "look at me" types. I'm referring to the ones Adrian mentioned earlier, and whom he encountered in the Apple store:

having worked in the fruity shop for nearly 10 years I have seen people from all walks of life who are completely obsessed about the newest and best phone, tablet or computer but really have no idea why. Accept they actually believe it will make them better and look better than others.

...and there are millions of them worldwide. They're not especially wealthy, but they've been brainwashed into behaving as above. What intrigues me, is what DRIVES the behaviour of *those* "look at me types"?

And there are more and more being similarly brainwashed daily... The key bit, in terms of the brainwashing, is indicated by the words: "but really have no idea why".

I stand by what I said about "nest builders" and "providers". I know there have been changes in the last 40 or so years, but largely it is still women who are more concerned with the finer details. It's not sexist of me to point at these differences - I'm not saying it's right or wrong, it just is. Certainly there will be exceptions, like your circumstances, and there is nothing wrong with that either.

Broadly, we agree. However, as far as the bit in bold goes, it depends on the work or social circles within which you frequent. If you're an 'arty' type or have an interest in interior design, and male [and there are plenty of us around], then the "finer details" matter a great deal

As an example, it took Del and I *months* to choose the colour for our bespoke-designed kitchen units, and almost as long to choose the style of handles for the drawers!

Actually your domestic arrangements are quite similar to mine, except that Mrs. P is the one that stays at home. Nothing wrong with either set up, as it works for us, as it does for you and Del. The only difference is that you chose to retire early, whereas Anita, who is a few years younger than you, was forced to leave a job she really liked because of ill health. She is now still 15 years away from retirement age, but will never go out to work again.

Sorry to hear what happened to Anita. That must've been hard to take.

I also stand by my comment about women having a good ear for hifi, but usually not giving a shit about it. Talk about youth being wasted on the young, good ears are wasted on most women. Except as somewhere to fix those big hoop ear rings, which make useful grab handles whenever she may be doing you a favour

I probably ruined my entire post with that last sentence, but I'll leave it in anyway.

Lol... Shall I play? No, I'll be a good boy for once!

Marco.

[Marco]

OK, but there's nothing new about people defining themselves through their possessions (and sometimes living beyond their means in their attempts to outdo their neighbours); it's been going on for thousands of years. It's the type of possessions that have changed, rather than the type of behaviour.

No I disagree, current modern technology has made materialistic behaviour worse than ever. However, it's pointless entering into a debate with you about it, as we'll never agree.

Marco.

[struth]

Consumerism came out after ww2 in the USA. Affluence grew, people started buying houses in suburbia and changing cars every year. Wives filled house with every convenience. Fast food took off. TV took off.
Then they shipped it over here.

[Marco]

Yes, but it goes deeper than that now, as the brainwashing is far more insidious.

Marco.