Disagree entirely. No-one wanted to shaft the EU, only to reach a win-win position on the basis of the economic fundamentals. it was the EU that decided to shaft the UK, for political reasons. However I'm sure they couldn't believe their luck when Theresa May and Olly Robbins meekly accepted every premise around sequencing, gave in over the backstop (something that even the Irish government prior to the chancer Varadkar's arrival were working towards in terms of a technological fix) and at the same time also concede the central point over the budget.
We held a few aces too, but we tossed them away thanks to Theresa May. (With recent assistance from Quislings like Dominic Grieve who are actively working to undermine the UK negotiating stance). The UK is the world's fifth largest economy. The UK is 12% of the EU population and has been paying 25% of the net contributions. France makes no net contributions, being a net recipient under the Common Agricultural policy). We provide the backbone of the security and intelligence capability, and provide the only financial centre worth speaking of (Paris and Frankfurt are tiny by comparison, about 10% the size). The UK provides the bulk of Euro financing for all EU Governments. Worldwide we have a seat on the UN security council and are the only NATO member apart from Poland meeting the 2% target of GDP for defence.
This is not a country that should accept being pushed around. The backstop is an almost unique example of an international treaty without an exit clause. The EU knows this and forcing it on us is an attempt to humiliate us. We have to send them packing, for our own self-respect. Leavers and Remainers should be united on this.