View Full Version : Kids!
A question for all you out there with offspring who have grown up and flown the nest.
When will I stop being poor?
Many years ago (but not yet enough) I was 'advised' that kids were expensive but things got easier as time passes. Horsehit! :lolsign:
I've got one who is just about to learn to drive (Don't ask about the insurance quote I got today! :steam:) and is looking at going to university next year. The other, who recently became a teenager, will no doubt be following along similar lines all too soon. It's bloody crippling me! :beer::violin:
I can't find the right section on ebay!
quadsugdenman
02-07-2010, 08:55
Mike
I'm sorry it gets worse.
Next will come their own car which no matter how much you try to resist contributing in any way, IT WILL still cost you shedloads.
University is certainly not like it was in my time where you tended to be 'all poor together' :no:
All her friends had cars, expensive laptops and seemed to be funded by the 'Bank of Mom and Dad'.
I sold my AR Classic 60 and my Hovland HP1 because I felt guilty about my daughter not having a car etc. :no:
BE VERY AFRAID, your hifi pride and joy is already edging towards the door and that AoS/e-bay listing - with heartstrings attached - gently being tugged by wife and children.
Be firm, resist my man - this weakling didnt and is paying the price :mental:
:wah:
Ali Tait
02-07-2010, 09:40
Ha! Try getting divorced if you think kids are expensive! Then,you've still got to pay for all the kids stuff on top of all that.
Sell 'em
That was my thought too, a few years ago :)
I can't find the right section on ebay!
Maybe I can help.
Although adult children do not achieve a great price in Italy.I have some contacts there :lolsign:
I sympathize with you Mike.I'm almost in your position.It is difficult to raise children these days.
My attitude is that they they must deserve every stuff they want.In a way that they can;helping us at home,learning in school,...etc.And most important is to be a Man (capital M).Let them work over the summer holidays.It is no shame to work,although seen differently in media :(.
Things or money do not fall from the sky and they must understand how the world works.
If they not (want) grow up into good people I leave all my stuff to the Society for the Protection of Animals :)
Regards,
Next will come their own car which no matter how much you try to resist contributing in any way, IT WILL still cost you shedloads.
That discussion has already started! :fence:
Unfortunately, it seems I am on a hiding to nowhere. It looks very much like it will be the cheaper (sic) option once he passes his test, I was quoted £2648.45 to add him to our current insurance. :steam:
quadsugdenman
02-07-2010, 17:28
My advice Mike, for what it is worth, is to contribute a SMALL amount to an old banger which can be driven into the ground and insured 3rd party only.
There is a saying I read somewhere that says something along the lines 'never let your offspring drive your car or you will continue to pay thereafter'. :(
Make deals regarding the funding dependant upon conditions, his contributions, learning to look after it himself etc. Makes it slightly more palatable. :cool:
aquapiranha
02-07-2010, 20:29
My son had his third driving lesson the other day. He constantly drops hints about cars and has already asked if he can drive mine - he can't it's a company car. He will be off to Uni in a year too so there goes a wad more cash....
Just glad my kids are retards and didn't go to uni :lol:
Only joking, my oldest two are both working and the other two are still at school, when they were all born me Vicky and my parents took out a small insurence policy that was a few quid a week to pay into, this matured when they were 17 giving them enough money to buy and insure thier first car, my eldest has been driving for a few months and my next eldest is still learning, i have been out with him tonight infact, but as you say it never stops it is always "dad can you just" but that is all part of being a parent and i wouldn't change it for the world, sniff tear comes to my eye
that is all part of being a parent and i wouldn't change it for the world
I wouldn't either, Jon... It's only money, but my God, it's a lot of it! :uhho:
To put it into perspective, all the money spent raising and educating our two would only buy a pair of speakers (Focal Grande Utopias)
Cheered me right up, you lot have. Oh how much fun are the next 20 years going to be...
There is NO WAY on earth I would let my kids drive my car - my dad let me - and if he only knew how I drove it, like a complete idiot. (Come to think of it, he did, after I lost control on a country road going far too fast, hit a bank, took off, removed most of the engine on a fire hydrant before careering through a fence and a poor old lady's garden...)
Cheered me right up, you lot have. Oh how much fun are the next 20 years going to be...
There is NO WAY on earth I would let my kids drive my car - my dad let me - and if he only knew how I drove it, like a complete idiot. (Come to think of it, he did, after I lost control on a country road going far too fast, hit a bank, took off, removed most of the engine on a fire hydrant before careering through a fence and a poor old lady's garden...)
I clearly remember having to go and find a farmer and asking if he'd be kind enough to bring his tractor along to drag the car out of a field and back through the hedge and onto the road. HIS field and hedge. And he did. For free! :)
I didn't half get into trouble in the morning though... I think I had to 'fill in a form' too... :doh:
Oh crap... it's all going to go very wrong. I'm remembering all sorts of 'stuff' I used to get up to.... :(
quadsugdenman
02-07-2010, 22:56
Cheered me right up, you lot have. Oh how much fun are the next 20 years going to be...
There is NO WAY on earth I would let my kids drive my car - my dad let me - and if he only knew how I drove it, like a complete idiot. (Come to think of it, he did, after I lost control on a country road going far too fast, hit a bank, took off, removed most of the engine on a fire hydrant before careering through a fence and a poor old lady's garden...)
Nah you will all be fine ;). Joking aside, I have three grown up kids and they have turned out to be just great. No matter how much money you spend on them, look upon it as an investment for the future. I would not have been without them irrespective of what it cost. It is only money! Cars, computers and hifi etc can be mended or even replaced, your kids are irreplaceable and they are the future :lolsign:
Let's not get too sappy, but having come to fatherhood late at age 40, it was one hell of a shock to my selfish lifestyle, but the best thing that ever happened to me, and I get far more entertainment out of my little girl than any of my possessions... Plus I've just told Mum that I'm going to start to put together a "my first hifi" so she is brought up with proper sound quality (and then hopefully won't shove all my 3,000 odd CDs straight in a skip when I peg it! :lol:)
Let's not get too sappy, but having come to fatherhood late at age 40, it was one hell of a shock to my selfish lifestyle, but the best thing that ever happened to me, and I get far more entertainment out of my little girl than any of my possessions... Plus I've just told Mum that I'm going to start to put together a "my first hifi" so she is brought up with proper sound quality (and then hopefully won't shove all my 3,000 odd CDs straight in a skip when I peg it! :lol:)
:eek:
Think I only have a quarter of that number! How do you catalogue them Alex?
"My first hifi" - sound like this could be a new thread: good quality budget system for beginners. What did you have in mind?
Regards
The Grand Wazoo
03-07-2010, 00:01
My advice is to chuck all the money you can at them. But only what you can afford and only when you can afford it.
That's easy for me to say, because we only have one. But she's had to adjust her expectations in line with ours. I suffered a major business upset a few years ago & we are still feeling the ramifications of it now. Treat them like rational adults and if you're lucky they will return that with respect and adult sensibilities.
Good luck, Mike!!
quadsugdenman
03-07-2010, 00:02
Let's not get too sappy, but having come to fatherhood late at age 40, it was one hell of a shock to my selfish lifestyle, but the best thing that ever happened to me, and I get far more entertainment out of my little girl than any of my possessions... Plus I've just told Mum that I'm going to start to put together a "my first hifi" so she is brought up with proper sound quality (and then hopefully won't shove all my 3,000 odd CDs straight in a skip when I peg it! :lol:)
Me sappy, think again pal, I have the scars to prove it. Just honest!!!
3,000 cds Wow!! Your floors must need reinforcing with that number. How do you store them and where?
As both Barry & Garry have asked, (on the subject of the original post, Garry & Barry sound like two children's TV presenters!) I will start a new thread, I think, on Music Storage rather than send this one in a completely different direction!
Barry - I think "My first hifi" would also be better off in a new thread, so I'll post that separately too.
Chris TGW - that has been our philosophy so far, but as you say, that is easier with just the one. We do sometimes worry that if we have another he or she won't get the same treatment, and will probably live off the hand-me-downs, but that's life I guess! It's also why I shan't be spending too much on new gear for a while - we've just completed a major project to re-do the garden making it much more child friendly, adding fencing to split the space into safe areas but with changes easily made later, lots of patio space for learning to ride bikes, lawn for climbing frame, paddling pools etc. We've put a summerhouse/playhouse in, (with a dedicated electrical consumer unit, and separate earth, which sort of ties in with the "My first hifi" theme, because that's where I am thinking of putting it to start with) - basically a £10k makeover, to give us all an outside space to try and keep us away from the TV and computers, and enjoy nature. So I guess I'm already a hopeless case, but we definitely want to instil a work ethic in her, so as soon as she is old enough to have little jobs that's my plan. It's a fine line between spoiling them though...
Garry - I meant I was about to be sappy, not that you were.
Oh, and finally - at least with teenagers they don't want to get up at 5am... (which is fine if you don't sit on a hifi forum until 1am...) When the nights were really bad when she was newborn, about 3 months old, I guess, my wife said "when does it start getting easier?" and my response - "I don't think it does get easier - it just gets different."
Ha! Try getting divorced if you think kids are expensive! Then,you've still got to pay for all the kids stuff on top of all that.
Been there done that, Still got the HiFi
StanleyB
03-07-2010, 07:48
I was quoted £2648.45 to add him to our current insurance. :steam:
Then you got the wrong car :). I was faced with the same problem. My car is a high risk missile, with tonnes of conversions added to it. The insurance company wanted nearly £5K to add my son on my insurance. So I bought an 18 months old 1.1L Hyundai and put my wife and son on it. The total cost of car and insurance for both of them came to the same £5K:lol:.
Then you got the wrong car :).
Quite possibly, Stan, but it's my wifes car (I haven't had a car of my own for over 10 years now) and it's pretty modest (read: crappy). A five year old Daewoo Lacetti 1.6SX... no doubt it's the 1.6 bit that's the problem!
The lowest insurance quote we've found for him so far is for a classic VW Beetle, still ~£950 though... :rolleyes:
He seems to have got the idea that he's going to York uni next year, and will commute daily. That's a daily round trip of around a hundred miles... I think I can guess where he thinks the petrol money is going to come from! :lolsign:
He seems to have got the idea that he's going to York uni next year, and commute daily. Thats a daily round trip of around a hundred miles... I think I can guess where he thinks the petrol money is going to come from! :lolsign:
The petrol money would probably work out cheaper than the cost of accommodation, but I expect once he gets there the desire to trek home every day will diminish.
StanleyB
03-07-2010, 10:41
Kids and motorways don't go together too well. After two decades of getting stuck in traffic hold ups due to accidents, I made sure my son got the message.
quadsugdenman
03-07-2010, 12:04
Yip accommodation can be a small fortune. I had no choice. My daughter chose to live in Twickenham to be close to the University. Hell I reckon I could have been propping up the economy of a small African dictatorship for what I paid out. :mental:
Living the student life is part of the experience IMHO. So he will so find the daily commute a major drag. As Stanley has rightly pointed out the troubles and tribulations of driving will soon become apparent. :rolleyes:
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