View Full Version : Dirty Tricks!! How Did You Get Even?
walpurgis
29-08-2014, 15:51
Just a bit of (harmless?) fun.
Has anybody pissed you off to the extent that the need to 'do something' became a necessity. If so what imaginative tricks have you used? (bear in mind, if it was illegal, don't elaborate too much).
Also, if you have any naughty stunts up your sleeve. Tell us do.
walpurgis
29-08-2014, 16:01
I'll start the ball rolling.
Cars parked in my way!! I live on a private estate, but locals from outside drive in and park all over the place causing much grief. Makes me livid!! :steam:
Now, I'm not saying I've done any of this, but a dollop of dog turd wiped under the driver's door handle drives a clear message home I'd say.
Jumping up and down on an exhaust tailpipe will break the rear rubber hanger and have the exhaust waving about and clattering, even hopefully breaking off.
A very long thin phillips screwdriver poked through the top of the front grille at a sideways angle will puncture the radiator core, but because most of the coolant is below the puncture, it won't leak significantly until the car warms up. Then a mile down the road maybe, it boils up and it's buggered.
All very naughty of course and I'm not suggesting for a moment that doing any of this is recommended. :eyebrows:
brian2957
29-08-2014, 16:19
Very large tattie or some expanding foam up the exhaust tailpipe usually works :lol:
walpurgis
29-08-2014, 16:39
Very large tattie or some expanding foam up the exhaust tailpipe usually works :lol:
Tried the spud thing. They always blow out!
Gordon Steadman
29-08-2014, 16:48
When I lived in Suffolk, we bought our house with a 'special deal' from the richest guy in the village. We needed a bit of extra as we could only borrow up to a certain limit. All went very well for three years but then the recession hit and suddenly we couldn't meet his part of the payments. Rather than wait a bit (as surprisingly, the banks decided to do given our track record) he just decided to make us personally bankrupt. By this time we had run out of spare cash and obviously couldn't borrow any more so bust it was.
Before the court case, he started stealing stuff from the front of the house, some obelisks, stone art etc. We thought this a bit mean and reported him to the police. In retaliation, he sent the boys round. Sadly for them, the shotgun was always kept by the back door - in case of anything worrying our cats you understand - and they decided that discretion was the better part of valour. We had a police patrol until we moved out to destinations unknown.
However........ afore we disappeared for good, our benefactor's Roller developed a sad case of superglued doors and boot. Also, a farmer friend who would normally be doing a bit of muck spreading in his fields, seemed to miss his turning and his load accidentally ended up all over our friend's front drive. Sadly, that was where the Elan was parked, as ever, with the top down as it was obviously trendier that way.
Now I, of course, had no prior knowledge of any of these unfortunate happenings but I did rather think they were very well deserved:eyebrows:
Drivers who open their doors on to your's without a care in the world. Best one was me sitting in the car at Tesco's when bollock chops gets in next to me and CLUMP! his door hits the passenger door. Out of my seat like a rat up a drainpipe, opened passenger door and DOUBLE CLUMP into his door. Not even a glance from Senor Chops as he drove off. Great driving a car that is worthless - and yes I still have it in case you're in my area:D
walpurgis
29-08-2014, 17:23
However........ afore we disappeared for good, our benefactor's Roller developed a sad case of superglued doors and boot. Also, a farmer friend who would normally be doing a bit of muck spreading in his fields, seemed to miss his turning and his load accidentally ended up all over our friend's front drive. Sadly, that was where the Elan was parked, as ever, with the top down as it was obviously trendier that way.
Now I, of course, had no prior knowledge of any of these unfortunate happenings but I did rather think they were very well deserved:eyebrows:
How unfortunate. I do hope you sent poor the chap a note of commiseration! :eek:
Once had an engineer (an arrogant one)that had been bad talking to customers about other engineers, so needed taking down a peg. When his car was in the garage for a service we went down and had a word with the mechanic who was a friend and got him to dismantle the heater so we could insert a rather smelly old trippler we had removed from a telly( a real stinker it was too). it was all put back together and the guy picked his motor up...mid winter it was too, and every time he put the heater on the smell was unbearable..he used to come in to the workshop freezing cold as he couldn't stand to odour. His wife and kids pretty much disowned him......took him 2 months to find it!.:eyebrows: Revenge is sweet:lol:
Gordon Steadman
29-08-2014, 17:54
How unfortunate. I do hope you sent poor the chap a note of commiseration! :eek:
Sadly, we lost touch. You know how it is when you move on. I'm sure he remembers us with great affection though:ner:
Very large tattie or some expanding foam up the exhaust tailpipe usually works :lol:
Don't try the tattie thing on powerful BMW's, as my mate did, and then stand behind the car howling with laughter as the owner turns the engine over. Not only did he receive a nasty bruise to his leg from the wayward spud but shortly thereafter his nose rather wished he'd buggered off to a safe distance beforehand. I, on the other hand, was beside myself with mirth as I witnessed the situation unfold (at a very safe distance I might add) as I'd already warned him of the possible consequences :D
walpurgis
29-08-2014, 18:14
Once, many years ago. Somebody who shall remain nameless, bought a used car from a rather dodgy dealer. It looked great, drove fine for a short test and had low mileage, so no problems were expected. However after it warmed up properly, it started blowing oil out of the filler cap. The bores were knackered!! The car was taken back and the dealer inevitably said "tough, fuck off".
The car's owner knew he could probably shift the motor on at a minor loss. But was perplexed. What to do in retaliation?
Having (quite) a few dodgy mates, one was persuaded (bribed) to pinch a car with keys in from outside the local mini mart one night (they're always being left like that, running even). The car thief met the upset car owner near the used car seller's premises and they drove around the back where they knew the dealer had a car lot. The entrance was unchained and the nicked motor parked right at the back. The keys were given to the upset car owner, who put them in an envelope and dropped them through the dealer's letter box.
The upset car owner was waiting near the 'showroom' early next day and when the dealer turned up, phoned the police and said "so and so dealer has a stolen car on his lot and the keys in his office". About half an hour later the law turned up and went inside. Not sure exactly what transpired, but the dealer was closed for a while afterwards.
Presumably the 'borrowed' car's owner got it back unharmed.
so we could insert a rather smelly old trippler we had removed from a telly( a real stinker it was too).
Wot’s one of dem, then? Never heard of it.
Marco.
Drivers who open their doors on to your's without a care in the world. Best one was me sitting in the car at Tesco's when bollock chops gets in next to me and CLUMP! his door hits the passenger door. Out of my seat like a rat up a drainpipe, opened passenger door and DOUBLE CLUMP into his door. Not even a glance from Senor Chops as he drove off. Great driving a car that is worthless - and yes I still have it in case you're in my area:D
Do you paint a tiny symbol - tick, swastika, etc for every score? :->
Do you paint a tiny symbol - tick, swastika, etc for every score? :->
Ha ha. No, I am much more chilled these days and can't be bothered by such minor transgressions :D Time was when Mrs Puffin would be screaming in the passenger seat as I sought to right a wrong that another motorist had dared to inflict on me:lol:
Wot’s one of dem, then? Never heard of it.
Marco.
ah, they put out the EHT to the anode of a crt. they put out about 25kv so you had to use silicon grease to seal the connection and keep moisture out, if not they could arc all over the joint....when they go, they smell awful especially if heated...a bit like something has died and not gone to heaven if you know what I mean..as a field engineer, I always brought mine home to base in several sealed bags.
Ah, I see… Lol. You learn something new every day! :)
Marco.
This thread conclusively proves that AOS has the most creativity. There are so many heartwarming stories for me to pass on to my children.
Whilst at Uni, we did the Student thing and the bunch of us went to various house parties, all good fun.
We went to one where the "host" (who was in one of our classes) was being an absolute arse; drunk, loud abusive and (most annoyingly to us) trying to get off with my mates wee sister to the point of feeling her chest and saying "oops"...that kind of thing.
We were helping ourselves to beer from his fridge (as you do) where one of us had the genius idea to get back at the guy.
From the fridge he took some raw chicken, unscrewed one of the light switches in the downstairs bedroom and stuck it in there. :)
Never stuck around long enough to witness the aftermath, but pretty sure it got a bit mysteriously smelly.....
Ah, happy days. :lol:
Whilst at Uni, we did the Student thing and the bunch of us went to various house parties, all good fun.
We went to one where the "host" (who was in one of our classes) was being an absolute arse; drunk, loud abusive and (most annoyingly to us) trying to get off with my mates wee sister to the point of feeling her chest and saying "oops"...that kind of thing.
We were helping ourselves to beer from his fridge (as you do) where one of us had the genius idea to get back at the guy.
From the fridge he took some raw chicken, unscrewed one of the light switches in the downstairs bedroom and stuck it in there. :)
Never stuck around long enough to witness the aftermath, but pretty sure it got a bit mysteriously smelly.....
Ah, happy days. :lol:
We did the same thing to an unscrupulous apartment owner in Ibiza one year who'd been sneaking into our room and helping himself to things. Only ours was a bag of small sardines and we his them in every possible crevice, including door handles, plug sockets, light fittings etc.
I once worked in a call centre one summer whilst at uni, I had the morning shift and used to desk share with a lad who'd do the pm shift. The pm shift lad had the most annoying habit of taking any stuff, stationary, tea bags and papers out of the drawers and throwing them away. As if my stuff was infringing on his personal space. I saw out the summer in that job and the day before I planned to leave, called by a pet shop on the way home. The shop sold tubs of live crickets for feeding to reptiles so I bought a couple of tubs. The next day as I prepared to leave I emptied the lively buggers into the drawers and headed for the door. I never saw what unfolded but according to second hand reports there was much screaming and panic from the females and he had them jumping everywhere for a while afterwards.
Finally, this is a good one if your employer pees you off. Photocopy a pen top or paper clip a hundred times and put the copies back into the paper stack. Ideally in the middle. The copier will work well for a while before someone reports a fault of something stuck in the mechanism. I've seen engineers called out for this one.
spendorman
29-08-2014, 23:52
Tried the spud thing. They always blow out!
Ian put potato up Phil's car exhaust, it backfired for him, I thought it very funny:
http://youtu.be/ZOegwCphG7A
walpurgis
29-08-2014, 23:54
I used to plug an extra mouse on an extension lead into the PC used by a colleague sitting not far from me and totally confused him by zooming the pointer about when he was working! He didn't find out what was going on and I unplugged it each time the IT bod was due along to investigate. My old chum would only have laughed if he'd known, because he liked my mischievous humour. I also sent out anonymous 'Tit Of The Week' award certificates to colleagues. Only if deserved though.
I love the idea of ‘Tit of the Week’ certificates - that’s just the kind of thing I’d do! :D
Marco.
In my opinion, this is a deeply unpleasant thread!
walpurgis
30-08-2014, 10:35
I wasn't anticipating universal approval. It's just a bit of laddish fun and I'm not expecting anyone to take it too seriously.
OK Boys; What can we do to sabotage Mark for his egregiously dour comment.
In my opinion, this is a deeply unpleasant thread!
I see it more as a confessional, and through confession we attain redemption.
My sense of karma these days negates what used to be strong vengeful streak. That and mellowing out a bit as I grow older.
Sand Dancin Donkey Walker
30-08-2014, 11:48
Once had a neighbour who thought it funny to cut block work with the a grinder and the dust covered my car.
When I pulled him up about it he told me to F*** Off.
The next day he found his car front window covered n Vaseline.
It tool him nearly 4 days to get rid of it all. Though on another note the window seals did look very clean and shiny.
He was always very kind and considerate after that, turned in to a good neighbour too.
office based again...
Take screenshot of pc desktop, copy it to clipboard.
Set image as desktop wallpaper
switch off icons
sit back and enjoy
Can't claim this one for myself, it was told to my father by an ex-serviceman mate who was in variety after the war.
The touring troupe was staying in a grotty boarding house run by a real harridan of a landlady who treated them like shit, so on the final morning several of them sacrificed their probably out of date breakfast kippers and carefully left them in a line all along the top of the pelmet above the curtains in the dining room, with inevitable consequences.
A week later, at their next venue, the band leader received a desperate phone call from said landlady yelling "Look, we know what it is and who put it there, but for fcuks sake tell us where it is!"
Sounds fishy to me... :lol:
I once bought some smoked haddock from our local fishmongers for my mum and lost it somehow on the way home. The journey home involved a bus journey so I hope the cleaners were on the ball that evening... :D
captains log
10-09-2014, 15:07
Lived in Birmingham for some time...many years ago... 20 storey block of flats... we were on the 17th... VERY NOISEY GITS above us...
I timed the lift descent from our floor to the 3rd floor...
Could always hear the slamming of the door as the people upstairs went out and waited for the lift...
I made a Lift Door opening key... very simple at the time.. just a 150mm long C section of tube... this, when inserted into the lift door on my floor would instantly stop the lift's descent and allow someone to rain heavy items down onto the top of the lift many floors below.
The screaming from the lift was very loud.....
Eagle owl
11-09-2014, 08:38
In November 2012 I asked a man to build me an integrated valve amplifier, he said It would be ready in a month, I didn't receive it until 22nd February 2013, it was faulty but the guy wouldn't do anything about it unless I footed the courier bills.
I took him to court and he submitted a statement saying I'd requested him to supply a previously owned amplifier which was sold to me on a "as seen basis". I proved him to be substantially incorrect because I produced a copy of the email I sent to him requesting him to build the amplifier plus his reply accepting the order. I won the case and he was ordered to refund my money plus expenses and arrange to collect the faulty amplifier. To date I've not received my money etc and he appears to have gone into hiding. The man is a despicable human being imho.
No dirty tricks on my part.
Name and shame I say, Geoffrey. Such scoundrels deserve to be outed for what they are! Consider that your 'revenge'....
Btw, do you know where he lives?
Marco.
walpurgis
11-09-2014, 20:57
In November 2012 I asked a man to build me an integrated valve amplifier, he said It would be ready in a month, I didn't receive it until 22nd February 2013, it was faulty but the guy wouldn't do anything about it unless I footed the courier bills.
I took him to court and he submitted a statement saying I'd requested him to supply a previously owned amplifier which was sold to me on a "as seen basis". I proved him to be substantially incorrect because I produced a copy of the email I sent to him requesting him to build the amplifier plus his reply accepting the order. I won the case and he was ordered to refund my money plus expenses and arrange to collect the faulty amplifier. To date I've not received my money etc and he appears to have gone into hiding. The man is a despicable human being imho.
No dirty tricks on my part.
As there's a court award, you can ask the court to direct their Sheriffs to collect for a modest fee. The court must have his address. Even if it's false or he's moved, the Sheriffs are skilled at tracking debtors.
Speak to 'The Clerk of The Court'.
Eagle owl
11-09-2014, 22:29
Name and shame I say, Geoffrey. Such scoundrels deserve to be outed for what they are! Consider that your 'revenge'....
Btw, do you know where he lives?
Marco.
Hi Marco, you have PM.
Eagle owl
11-09-2014, 22:33
As there's a court award, you can ask the court to direct their Sheriffs to collect for a modest fee. The court must have his address. Even if it's false or he's moved, the Sheriffs are skilled at tracking debtors.
Speak to 'The Clerk of The Court'.
Thanks Geoff, if the normal bailiff is unsuccessful I will probably go down that route.
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