The worst LP or CD you have ever owned?

[Roy S]

[JohnJo]

Neither of those, the one I have is Chas and Dave's Chrismas Carol Album.

Which one? 'A Cockney Christmas With Chas And Dave' or 'A Christmas Knees Up With Chaz And Dave'

The former has blisteringly good reviews. Here's one:

'enjoyed the carols and all the old songs. There (sic) voices were nice and easy to understand by everyone young and old'

Might get the brace of them for this year's festivities.

Might.

[montesquieu]

Eric Dolphy 'Out to Lunch'. What a load of complete and utter pish.

EDIT - oops I see Andy got in ahead of me.

[montesquieu]

Christopher your not the first person to tell me this, but for me music has to be tuneful and this and many more "free jazz" records I have heard just leave me cold. I try and keep my jazz as tuneful and gentle as possible. I also struggle with most Miles I have heard, I have tried very hard to like it but I do struggle. Maybe I should just stick with Abba

I once shared a flat (and played in a band with) a double bass player who eventually found his way into free jazz. Quite a few years after we went our separate ways, I made the mistake of taking a young lady to one of his free jazz gigs anticipating the 'proper' jazz I know that he can play very well. Well that was the end of that. And to be fair the friendship hasn't been the same since either - there was no getting away from the mutual disappointment (this is someone I've known for 25 years) me in the rubbish he was playing, him in my lack of ability to 'get' it.

I recall I left an Ornette Colman concert at half time at the Edinburgh Festival. I felt like the wee boy in the story of the Emperor's New Clothes - it just seemed to me that the people around me were being taken for mugs, that the band must be having a right laugh backstage getting money for random instrumental farting. (Thankfully the ticket was free as I was a journalist at the time).

I wouldn't put Miles quite in that bracket though the vast majority of his output definitely has something going for it, even the challenging 'later' stuff. Of course his early stuff was just as groundbreaking, except it's now become very familar through repetition and imitation.

[Jason P]

One day in the streets of Leicester I was handed a cd by a pretty girl. I feared a scam, but she assured me there was no catch... just a PR excessive.

Admiring the well though out artwork and packaging, I slipped the CD into my friends Linn Classik, and pressed play.

Nothing, and I mean nothing, could have prepared me for the horror that is Rich Shapero's 'Wild Animus: The Ram'. Words cannot adequately describe the noise that issued forth from the loudspeakers. We sat, transfixed at the sheer awfulness of the lyrics, the bombastic edge to his voice, and the random squawks masquerading as music. Each track seemed to raise the bar of cringeworthyness to heights unimaginable. I had found the holy grail... possibly the worst album ever.

Shapero, it turns out, was a US venture capitalist with a lot of money, a burning desire to write the great American novel (and release 3 accompanying CDs) but (and this is a personal opinion) without any accompanying talent to pull the thing off. And, it seems, no friends willing to tell him this uncomfortable truth.

Those of you with a strong aural disposition can find the offending album here:

https://open.spotify.com/album/2hLlZutTK0yxTtxHuP1D91

[RichB]

Nirvana "Bleach"

Really? I heard they recorded this for 500 bucks and it does sound like it but having seen them during this period I quite enjoyed it. Sure it's not going to win any songwriting awards but you get the energy of the band from it, in spite of the iffy musicianship... Of course Kurt would later go on be a accomplished by rock guitarist but it captures a vibe at a moment in time quite well.