Olympics

[Stratmangler]

I'am glad we have it.
Would have liked to seen it spread around the country though so every city had a slice of the pie.

The football is spread all over the place
There are matches scheduled in Manchester Trafford, for example.

[Stratmangler]

I would never get a job with the government
Too much fecking sense

Amen.

[Stratmangler]

Wot's going on with these "Olympic Traffic" lanes wot have been set up in Lundun?

[John]

The traffic lanes are a complete joke I could see some of these major roads becoming gridlocked at peak times

[prestonchipfryer]

Some of you may be aware that the sailing competitions are taking place here in Weymouth and Portland.

This morning there were approx. 60 Army lads being marched along the road into Portland as I drove past. That's some of the security then. Also there are check points manned by civvy security guards at the entrance to the sailing academy.

There has been major disruption now for over two years as improvements have been made to the road infrastructure here.

Let's hope all the expense is worth it in our Olympic teams' medals. Somehow, though, I doubt it.

[bobbasrah]

From today's Torygraph: Team GB wins Gold in drivel

The dialogue in Twenty Twelve, the BBC sitcom satirising the preparations for the London 2012 Olympics, is a near-continuous torrent of marketing drivel. Characters babble about how London “prides itself on its multicultural-ality”, and how a new website will “break open the Google-juice”.

In reality, of course, the people in charge of the Olympic preparations don’t talk like that.

They’re much more ridiculous.

Proof of this was heard today at a press conference about the Games’ financial “legacy” – or, if you prefer, the Olympic gold. Taking questions were Hugh Robertson, who is the Olympics minister, plus three other big cheeses, one of whom rejoices in the job title “Managing Director, Olympics Legacy”.

This was a glorious showcase for Britain’s world-class achievements in the field of gibberish. Mystifying phrases shot past like sprint cyclists. “Thought-leadership sessions… inward investment outcomes… confirmed legacy tenants… £4bn in high-value opportunities… £476m in uncommitted contingency…”

Word of the day was “leverage”. Tax-payers who have contributed to the £9.3bn cost will be pleased to learn that the UK plans to “leverage value” from the Games: indeed, “there’s been a really big determination to leverage the Games to the greatest extent”. Promoters have “leveraged the campaign across all our platforms”.

You wonder how these people talk when they get home at night. “Good day at work, dear?” “Not bad. Committed a couple of outcomes. Invested an inward legacy summit. What’s for dinner?” “Sorry, this is my book club night. You’ll have to leverage it yourself.”

Undisputed champion of jargon was Sandie Dawe, chief executive of the tourism agency VisitBritain. Her goal, she explained, is “to put [Britain] on the wish-lists of growth markets around the world” (i.e., get the Chinese to visit). The good news: “Research shows that Britain is really strong on heritage and culture.” The bad news: “It’s a bit educational. Is it possibly a bit dull? Where’s the fun? Where’s the kind of excitement? So that’s what we want to dial up on…”

One way she’s dialled up on the fun is by creating “a raft of celebrity films… We’ve got some sports people: Lennox Lewis, Boris Becker, Colin Montgomerie, Jamie Oliver…”

A reporter asked if the rain might put the growth markets off. “It’s only the Brits that have an obsession with our weather,” tutted Ms Dawe. “Frankly, people don’t come here to lie on a beach – that’s not our offer.” Curiously, of the many photos Ms Dawe used in her presentation, all showed Britain bathing in fabulous sunshine.
Mr Robertson was evasive on the G4S shambles. “What happens to Nick Buckles is a matter for the post-Games environment,” he said, making it sound like an apocalyptic waste land.
He looked rather happier sharing an exciting fact he’d learnt about the construction of the Olympic Park. “The soil clean-up operation was so effective,” he beamed, “that sufficient soil was removed from the site, cleansed and then put back on the site to fill the Albert Hall 220 times over!”

Now there’s an idea to help British tourism dial up on the fun. “Come and watch the famous filling-of-the-Albert-Hall-with-cleansed-soil! For 220 nights only!”

[Macca]

Excellent.

Personally, I'd like to dial up on shooting all of these idiots...we pay their wages dontcha know?

[bobbasrah]

Excellent.

Personally, I'd like to dial up on shooting all of these idiots...we pay their wages dontcha know?

....and they tell us how much, then a committee of them ratify the increase to cries of "we are all in this together......"

[Puffin]

Bobbasrah. Excellent post!

[walpurgis]

I like Bob's reference to 'leverage'.

Presumably, we are the fulcrum, i.e., we are to be leaned on and take the strain and burden! The government won't, they'll just lay back and watch their corporate, 'fat cat' chums raking it off at our expense.