PDA

View Full Version : Camper Vans and Live-in Vehicles :)



Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 18:53
Perhaps not everyone's cup of tea, but I like 'em!

Here are a few pictures of funky Camper Vans and other Live-In Vehicles I've taken at festivals and VW shows... and one of me own van, which is soon to be sold 'cos it's just too much hassle with a young family who demand too much comfort :bah: !

My van... the 'ambience' ;)

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_01_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_11_s.jpg

Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 18:58
I love the Type 25 Synchro - VW's wedge-like 4wd Transporter. They are great safari vehicles, and often used as Ambulances when off-road ability is important...

The orange Synchro is just fantastic :)

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_03_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_04_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_07_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_05_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_09_s.jpg


This one may look beaten up, but it was road legal and was driven from Sweden to the show I saw it at in Gloucestershire. The rust had been varnish finished, to preserve it!

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_06_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_14_s.jpg


Ratty vans look so cool :)

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_10_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_12_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_15_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_17_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_18_s.jpg

Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 18:58
I would love to have either of these vehicles for my holiday home!


http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_13_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_02_s.jpg


And this one's just a classic, despite it's lack of living quarters!

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/Vans/van_19_s.jpg

symon
19-05-2009, 19:01
I really like split screen campers.

Nice pics

Ali Tait
19-05-2009, 19:06
Are you going to Glastonbury Nick? Any one else here going?

Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 19:09
I'm going! It'll be my van's last trip before it gets the flick :)

aquapiranha
19-05-2009, 19:33
A freind's dad has a camper, he affectionatly calls it .... "The cottage.." :)

If you want a proper one look at some of the Pinzgauers and Unimogs conversions around!

you want 4 or 6 wheel drive??

http://www.shropshiregunbus.co.uk/?gclid=CIvQjbuPyZoCFR1N5QodBFCZ2g

http://www.shropshiregunbus.co.uk/showcase.asp

:lolsign:

Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 19:59
Wow! Top link :eyebrows: I love ex-military vehicles too! We get a lot of really good / unique live-in vehicles round here (I'm in the bohemian end of Bristol) and the best seem to be rebuilds of old military vehicles!

I would like to get another decent van at some point, when the kids are old enough. I'll have to bookmark Shropshire Gunbus for future reference!

My daily driver is a Mitsubishi Delica... like this one (I've not got a pic of my own to hand!):

http://www.autoworx.com.au/Cars/DELICA/707/707-4.jpg

It's pretty funky off-road, though I've not had the pleasure yet :)

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2mZJpgsYaGk

aquapiranha
19-05-2009, 20:07
is that one of those 2.8 turbo thingies? I have seen a few around. If you look on youtube, you will find loads on the Pinzgauer, best 4X4 (or 6X6) around!

Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 20:15
is that one of those 2.8 turbo thingies?

:lol: A little excessive perhaps, but I do use public transport for the daily commute!

To be honest, I love it. Very comfortable, great when you've got to cart the family around, and dead easy to drive :eyebrows:

Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 20:21
If you look on youtube, you will find loads on the Pinzgauer, best 4X4 (or 6X6) around!

Nice. I want one!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RNtpQvhGBB0

Marco will love the music! :fingers: :fingers:

Marco
19-05-2009, 20:42
Hehe... Nice one, Beechy. I'm not sure though if it sounds quite as 'visceral' through my laptop as it did at Scalford Hall :eyebrows:

I *love* VW camper vans, as they are so cool, but only the original 1950s ones. The first ones you posted were way too modern! :)

Marco.

Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 20:54
I *love* VW camper vans, as they are so cool, but only the original 1950s ones. The first ones you posted were way too modern! :)

I like the ratty looking splitties. They are cool. Unless Jamie Oliver's behind the wheel :lol: ;)

The Grand Wazoo
19-05-2009, 21:14
There's only one camper van for me...................I think the engine needs a bit of a tweak though................

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7aidkQ4DBKk

aquapiranha
19-05-2009, 21:21
Haha! I could waste a whole evening on youtube...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GgRixrnPZAU&feature=related

The Grand Wazoo
19-05-2009, 21:22
Actually, I lied. There is actually another good camper van..............http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=7aidkQ4DBKk

Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 21:26
:lol:

How's about this then, Chris ;)

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/mystery_machine/mystery_01_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/mystery_machine/mystery_02_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/mystery_machine/mystery_03_s.jpg

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/mystery_machine/mystery_04_s.jpg


How cool is that? If I were a kid I'd definitely want to go on holiday in one of those!

aquapiranha
19-05-2009, 21:29
Tell you what, it's a bloody mystery why anyone would want to be seen driving it!!!

Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 21:30
And for Steve... :eyebrows:

http://homepage.mac.com/beechwoods/AOS/ranover_s.jpg

The Grand Wazoo
19-05-2009, 21:32
Ah yes, but yours uses fossil fuel whereas mine is powered by scooby snacks!!

On reflection, I think I prefer my second choice!

aquapiranha
19-05-2009, 21:32
Hahaa, must be for "narrow minded" planet waster's who drive gas guzzlers...?

Ali Tait
19-05-2009, 21:35
I'm going! It'll be my van's last trip before it gets the flick :)

Nice one! We'll have to arrange to meet up.You'll like my mate's V8 Land-Rover 101 complete with trailer.We'll be in the campervan fields too.

Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 21:35
Excellent Ali! Mine'll be the one with the kids that wake everyone up at 4.30 in the morning! Last year I got there on the Friday evening because I had to get a new starter motor at the last minute :steam:

This year will be better!

Ali Tait
19-05-2009, 21:45
We've been lucky and had no break-downs yet! We usually go in Wed afternoon.4.30? We'll just be going to bed...

Beechwoods
19-05-2009, 21:51
We used to go for the Wednesday, but cut it finer now. I suspect we will go on the Friday morning or Thursday evening.

Doing Glasto with a 2½ year old and a 1 year old last year was an experience. Very different to your usual Glasto! Didn't see much music but had a great time in the Kids Field / Green Fields. Early to bed early to rise! Check my profile picture to see my youngest's Glasto bathtime!

Ali Tait
20-05-2009, 07:11
Yes,my mate and I have taken our kids a couple of times.They'd come every year I think,but were put off by the horrible weather a couple of years ago.Aside from that,thet loved it!

Alex_UK
18-04-2010, 11:58
Gratuitous use of an old thread to show off the new wheels/tyres & steering guard I've just put on Maggie, the retired expedition Land Rover...

http://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu259/Alex_Steel1969/IMG_2585.jpg?t=1271591148

I rather fancy one of these though, a Russian Ural 375D converted to a camper - (One was on ebay recently, kitted out amazingly, but you need an HGV One licence and you'll get single-figure MPG... oh, and it was 25 grand! :eek:)

http://i188.photobucket.com/albums/z241/expeditioncampers/ural-4320.jpg?t=1271578627

And if anyone knows what this is I'd be interested to know?

http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d45/Basia678/misc/page15-1008-full.jpg

Now THATS what you need for Glastonbury! :)

Rare Bird
18-04-2010, 12:04
These are the greatest thing for travelling around

http://www.mystuffonline.co.uk/resources/_wsb_560x417_Van-1.jpg

Jonboy
18-04-2010, 12:21
Gratuitous use of an old thread to show off the new wheels/tyres & steering guard I've just put on Maggie, the retired expedition Land Rover...

http://i653.photobucket.com/albums/uu259/Alex_Steel1969/IMG_2585.jpg?t=1271591148

I rather fancy one of these though, a Russian Ural 375D converted to a camper - (One was on ebay recently, kitted out amazingly, but you need an HGV One licence and you'll get single-figure MPG... oh, and it was 25 grand! :eek:)

http://i188.photobucket.com/albums/z241/expeditioncampers/ural-4320.jpg?t=1271578627

And if anyone knows what this is I'd be interested to know?

http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d45/Basia678/misc/page15-1008-full.jpg

Now THATS what you need for Glastonbury! :)

I like the Landy Alex,

I was watching this video last week on the Above Tatra

<object width="480" height="385"><param name="movie" value="http://www.youtube.com/v/mq5mMVd3p1E&hl=en_GB&fs=1&"></param><param name="allowFullScreen" value="true"></param><param name="allowscriptaccess" value="always"></param><embed src="http://www.youtube.com/v/mq5mMVd3p1E&hl=en_GB&fs=1&" type="application/x-shockwave-flash" allowscriptaccess="always" allowfullscreen="true" width="480" height="385"></embed></object>

Alex_UK
18-04-2010, 13:56
Thanks Jon. Always loved Landys especially, but off-roaders in general. Nice one on identifying the Tatra - and great video - just amazing what such big trucks will do.

Barry
18-04-2010, 16:32
Is where you have fitted the number plate legal Alex?

I thought there was both a minimum and a maximum height from the road for them.

Apologies for being an insufferable pedant! ;)

Regards

Beechwoods
18-04-2010, 16:58
Wow... I've just had to wipe the dribble from my keyboard. Your Land Rover is gorgeous Alex. And the Ural 375D... nom nom nom!

I've got a week off in May to fix up my daily driver with a sink and cooker for Glastonbury. We found an old VW unit in the street a while back so it just needs a new frame and finish. Way beyond my usual DIY stuff, but why not :)

Jonboy
18-04-2010, 17:44
I very nearly bought one of these a while back, you can drive it on a car licence if you passed your test before about 1990.
A Scammel Explorer 6x6 running a Gardiner 180 6 cyl diesel, they were also fitted with a 10.35 litre petrol engine doing about 2-3 to the gallon off road :mental: hence the diesel conversions

http://i419.photobucket.com/albums/pp272/jonboy_01/scammell_recovery.jpg

Ian Walker
18-04-2010, 18:54
Hehe... Nice one, Beechy. I'm not sure though if it sounds quite as 'visceral' through my laptop as it did at Scalford Hall :eyebrows:

I *love* VW camper vans, as they are so cool, but only the original 1950s ones. The first ones you posted were way too modern! :)

Marco.

You gota be jokin drivin and even worse sleepin in one of those is my idea of pure shithell...:)

Beechwoods
18-04-2010, 19:23
You gota be jokin drivin and even worse sleepin in one of those is my idea of pure shithell...:)

This is more like it Ian:

http://www.dragonwagons.co.nz/images/campervan-rentals-nz-06-gallery06.jpg

http://www.dragonwagons.co.nz/images/campervan-rentals-nz-07-gallery07.jpg

http://www.dragonwagons.co.nz/images/campervan-rentals-nz-08-yellow_int.jpg

http://www.dragonwagons.co.nz/images/campervan-rentals-nz-05-white_van.jpg

Alex_UK
18-04-2010, 20:25
Is where you have fitted the number plate legal Alex?

I thought there was both a minimum and a maximum height from the road for them.

Apologies for being an insufferable pedant! ;)

Regards

Hi Barry,

It is quite common to see them here, I got the idea from the magazines - the theory I believe being that there is less chance of it being obscured by mud - it has been through two different MOT test stations with no issues, so I can only guess it must be OK!?

Alex_UK
18-04-2010, 20:31
Wow... I've just had to wipe the dribble from my keyboard. Your Land Rover is gorgeous Alex. And the Ural 375D... nom nom nom!

I've got a week off in May to fix up my daily driver with a sink and cooker for Glastonbury. We found an old VW unit in the street a while back so it just needs a new frame and finish. Way beyond my usual DIY stuff, but why not :)

Thanks Nick. Good luck with the DIY - all of the cosmetic stuff I'm happy doing, but when it comes to anything mechanical or safety related it is best left to the experts. The Delica's look fab - "beefy" vans and trucks rule! Good luck with the sink & cooker.

Alex_UK
18-04-2010, 20:33
That Scammel is a beastie John - are they from the 50's? Lovely!

Jonboy
18-04-2010, 21:18
they were the natural progresion on from the Pioneers just after the war, a little info here (http://www.rememuseum.org.uk/vehicles/wrv/vehscamx.htm)

Macca
18-04-2010, 21:18
And if anyone knows what this is I'd be interested to know?

http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d45/Basia678/misc/page15-1008-full.jpg



Easy - it's Thunderbird....err....Twenty-Seven.:lol:

Alex - your Land Rover is beyond super-cool - you've even got the snorkel kit for f**ks sake! - Respect;)

Alex_UK
19-04-2010, 13:23
Thanks for the info Jon, and the compliment Martin - The Snorkel was already fitted when I bought her, as was the roof rack and top lights - Maggie was an expedition vehicle, used to do charity work in Africa so I was told - she certainly was fully expedition prepared - extra fuel tank (130 litres in total I believe - I've never found out, not at over £1.20 a litre!) water tank, extra seating and electrical points, sand ladders, roof tent - even fixing points for a camp shower! Sadly most of the additional kit was missing, but not needed now she is retired in Suffolk, though she does go off road (I'm a member of the Suffolk club, who own their own off road site) plus I do do a bit of considerate green laning - nothing like getting off the tarmac and seeing what these vehicles can do - which is way more than my nerves can handle!

EDIT: If any one is interested, even a modern "Chelsea Tractor" Landy is immensely capable off road - perhaps even more so with the traction control and other aids these days - look how impressive this Discovery 3 is...

STt7DmJeeVc

goraman
21-04-2010, 04:28
I could spend a week or more in this.

Beechwoods
21-04-2010, 06:02
:lol: I remember seeing that on Top Gear or something. The 'reveal' when it dawned that there was a sports car under the RV was classic!

Rare Bird
21-04-2010, 11:12
http://farm3.static.flickr.com/2203/2062321850_39bba0d925.jpg

Marco
21-04-2010, 14:01
Quality, matey - none of yer modern run-of-the-mill, soulless, pish! ;)

Marco.

Rare Bird
21-04-2010, 17:04
Too right, Split windscreen aswell, split screens are tons better looking :trust:

Jonboy
21-04-2010, 20:05
my splity was a 59 Devon conversion complete with patchwork curtains

Ali Tait
21-04-2010, 20:59
Split screens are the biz! you see some beauties at Glastonbury.

Beechwoods
21-04-2010, 21:06
Nah, you want a Unimog for real cool at Glastonbury... it's what I'd have if I won the Lottery...

http://i560.photobucket.com/albums/ss49/aos_images/beechwoods/unimog.jpg

Jonboy
21-04-2010, 21:09
Spent as much time fixing it as i did driving it, sold it for £500 twenty years ago cos i woz skint, it is now worth 5 grand upwards, rough as it was

aquapiranha
21-04-2010, 22:18
Nah, you want a Unimog for real cool at Glastonbury... it's what I'd have if I won the Lottery...

http://i560.photobucket.com/albums/ss49/aos_images/beechwoods/unimog.jpg

Nice. Bit heavy on the juice though really, as well as the price of tyres etc. Mind if you won the lottery I doubt you would be worried. Personally I would have a nice Pinzgauer.

There is a guy not far from me who used to have one of these in the front driveway...

3mr_pCrhTkk

Ian Walker
22-04-2010, 08:56
This is more like it Ian:

http://www.dragonwagons.co.nz/images/campervan-rentals-nz-06-gallery06.jpg

http://www.dragonwagons.co.nz/images/campervan-rentals-nz-07-gallery07.jpg

http://www.dragonwagons.co.nz/images/campervan-rentals-nz-08-yellow_int.jpg

http://www.dragonwagons.co.nz/images/campervan-rentals-nz-05-white_van.jpg

Christ no, if i woke up in that(3rd piccy down) i'd think i'd been buried alive:lol:

Alex_UK
22-04-2010, 19:36
Nah, you want a Unimog for real cool at Glastonbury... it's what I'd have if I won the Lottery..

http://www.maximog.com/vehicle.html

Beechwoods
22-04-2010, 20:11
:stalks: :stalks: Oh Yes...!

Alex_UK
22-04-2010, 21:19
Certainly looks the bees-knees, but this worries me slightly "computer controlled suspension, and integrated electrical, hydraulics and electronics systems. Many of the onboard navigation, power, lighting, communications, computation and electro-optics systems were developed specifically for this vehicle" - so who is going to be able to fix it if it goes wrong in the middle of the Sahara - I suppose you just switch it off and switch it on again, and everything is ok?! ;)

(The main reason I have a 200 tdi Defender, the last of the line with no electronics at all to go wrong - plenty of other things to go wrong, of course - it is still a Landy!)

UV101
22-04-2010, 21:37
ooh! I just found this thread! I got a T2 bay window!! Its my 2nd one. This 1 was a 1972 which was a project that I never quite finished! (How many times do you hear that with VW's!!!)

http://i497.photobucket.com/albums/rr332/Trunky1812/Beetle%20Bus/IMG_5453.jpg

I've now got a 79 2.0 with carbs (binned the injection system). The only down fall is it has an upside down boat for a roof (not literally!)

http://i497.photobucket.com/albums/rr332/Trunky1812/Beetle%20Bus/IMG_5977Custom.jpg

I'd really like to find a decent import complete roof for it but I don't like the idea of another van being scrapped to save my asthetics!!

Shame its not taxed and MOT'd just at the mo cos now the suns out i'd really like to have buggered off in it for the weekend!

Funny thing campers. Do you know its more ecconomical for me t tow it on a dolly with my diesel audi than it is to drive it under its own steam!!!!!!:lolsign:

I must be mad!!!

Beechwoods
22-04-2010, 22:23
Funny thing campers. Do you know its more ecconomical for me t tow it on a dolly with my diesel audi than it is to drive it under its own steam!!!!!!:lolsign:

Love it, Ian! But can you spend a week in the Lake District sleeping the back of your Audi ;) :lol: That's where the economy kicks in!

UV101
22-04-2010, 22:46
You could try, but making the bacon sandwiches in the morning would be somewhat more difficult! I'm hoping this sunny weather we are having at the start of the year is not the summer like it was last year!!! Its ready to roll! jusr need to get it down to the MOT station and hope for a ticket! Its always a lottery! I think it should be ok provided I can use the brakes a few times on the way. It wasn't used at all last year which was a real pity. Fingers crossed that me and the misses can get a few weekends to ourselves waking up looking out at whatever view we chose. :):)

Beechwoods
09-06-2010, 22:08
Oh yes... :)

http://www.telegraph.co.uk/travel/familyholidays/7813728/France-Caravans-fit-for-a-gipsy-king.html

Want one!

Techno Commander
26-06-2010, 19:16
I rather fancy one of these though, a Russian Ural 375D converted to a camper - (One was on ebay recently, kitted out amazingly, but you need an HGV One licence and you'll get single-figure MPG... oh, and it was 25 grand! :eek:)

http://i188.photobucket.com/albums/z241/expeditioncampers/ural-4320.jpg?t=1271578627

And if anyone knows what this is I'd be interested to know?

http://i32.photobucket.com/albums/d45/Basia678/misc/page15-1008-full.jpg

Now THATS what you need for Glastonbury! :)

The Urals are top wagons and almost indestructable. About 8K for a good one ready for outfitting.

The big wagon is an Action Mobile (http://www.actionmobil.at/) and is based on the MAN 8 wheel military chassis. They do smaller ones though. Here are some pictures of one we had turn up at work a couple of years back. Superb engineering, but eye wateringly expensive.

http://i246.photobucket.com/albums/gg116/sillystuff99/offroad/1.jpg

http://i246.photobucket.com/albums/gg116/sillystuff99/offroad/3.jpg

http://i246.photobucket.com/albums/gg116/sillystuff99/offroad/5.jpg

http://i246.photobucket.com/albums/gg116/sillystuff99/offroad/6.jpg


The real bargain wagon for doing off road camping is the Swedish Military Volvo C303.
http://www.oto6.free.fr/6roues/c306/C306_ambulance-1.jpg

They "scrub up" really well if you're handy with the paint & spanners.
http://expeditionportal.com/forum/attachment.php?attachmentid=2329&d=1150342967

These are under 3.5 tons and can be had for around £4K

Effem
27-06-2010, 07:16
I prefer my creature comforts :)

Bought this back in 1999

http://i249.photobucket.com/albums/gg208/kernowman/DartmoorP6501.jpg

6 berth job on a Mercedes Sprinter chassis.

Trouble was it was not far off it's loading limit even when empty, so how on earth you could carry 6 people and all that they need for a holiday is beyond me. It really could have done with a tandem axle to be honest. The interior was rather delicate due to keeping the weight down and once a tin of beans fell out of a storage locker then straight through the table beneath :(

It was surprisingly economical too if you weren't lead footed; I got from Cornwall to the Scottish border on just one tank of diesel.

In 2002 I drove from Cornwall to Portugal following the coast roads all the way and that clocked up almost 7,000 miles in 3 weeks. Great trip I would love to do again one day with better company than I had on the last one.

Marco
27-06-2010, 07:25
Great trip I would love to do again one day with better company than I had on the last one.


LOL.....Tell us more! :eyebrows:

Marco.

Effem
27-06-2010, 08:22
LOL.....Tell us more! :eyebrows:

Marco.

Bit of a sorry tale to be honest Marco.

I went with a woman I was living with that had a really obnoxious spoilt daughter, with an equally obnoxious spoilt boyfriend with a hidden agenda.

His parents had an apartment in Benalmedena in Spain, who just happened to be going on holiday at the same time but nobody told me this before departure. As he boarded the 'van for this epic journey he announces that he is car sick, so by the time we hit the Torpoint ferry ONE MILE AWAY he is looking very green. Nice. Not only that, he seems unable to eat any food apart from McDonalds burgers, so you can image that any ordinary road map wasn't much use really, it had to be a McDonalds road map FFS. This was really getting on my tits and came to a head in Le Mans. Parked up for the night to the South of Le Mans when we had to venture out to find a McD to feed this clown and ended up on the North side of Le Mans. Get fed, return to the campsite, next morning daughter is whining she can't find her handbag. Yep, you guessed, she had left it at McDonalds. Frank's fuse is well and truly lit.

Drive on to Oradur Sur Glanes near Limoges and these two start whining when are we going to arrive at Benalmedena and there after non-stop until we arrive at Benalmedena two days later. It transpires that sonny boy is not only car sick but airsick as well, that's why he wanted to go by road because he was less carsick than airsick. As far as the kids were concerned we had arrived at the holiday destination.

Not so, after a lot of arguments the boy's parents persuade me to take boysie along. No more McD's, he ate what we did or he walks home was my terms and conditions.

Carried on the coast road towards Portugal, stopping at the touristy spots, looking at 2 miserable faces the whole time, with mutters of "bored" every 5 minutes. Approaching Lisbon now and an almighty argument broke out at 2 in the morning because these kids turned up pissed and wanted to go camping on the beach.

Frank's fuse has now reached the detonator folks, so he packs everything away securely and headed back to Benalmedena by the direct overland route. When I got there I opened the caravan door and slung matey's belongings out of the door and him with it, shut the door and drove off. My mobile rings 30 minutes later with an irate mother shouting the odds at the way I treated her son. I told her she should be greatful I didn't heave him out halfway across the hot dusty Spanish badlands.

From there all the way back to Cornwall it was in almost total silence. Never again.

Marco
27-06-2010, 09:15
Bloody hell, your patience amazes me... I'd have annihilated the whinging f*cker LONG before that and shoved a Big Mac so far up his backside it would've acted as a permanent suppository!!! :guns: :guns:

Marco.

Techno Commander
27-06-2010, 11:24
:eek:

Harsh, but fair.

Effem
27-06-2010, 12:26
Bloody hell, your patience amazes me... I'd have annihilated the whinging f*cker LONG before that and shoved a Big Mac so far up his backside it would've acted as a permanent suppository!!! :guns: :guns:

Marco.

Mind you, I did drive away with the little bastids passport so he had to get another one before he could fly home :lol:

Marco
27-06-2010, 18:08
Nice one! :eyebrows:

I blame the way parents bring up some of these kids as spoiled brats. It's pathetic, and so no wonder they grow up expecting their every whim to be catered for, and then throw a strop when it doesn't happen.......! :rolleyes:

I mean, aside from anything else, what kind of brain-dead idiots bring up their kids so that they'll ONLY eat junk food from McDonalds? :mental:

Marco.

Beechwoods
27-06-2010, 20:11
The real bargain wagon for doing off road camping is the Swedish Military Volvo C303.

...

These are under 3.5 tons and can be had for around £4K

That machine looks fantastic. I think you've worked out what kind of thing I like :lol: I imagine though that £4k buys the base vehicle... double that for a basic camper conversion... and quadruple it for anything coachbuilt! What a great machine though, and I bet it's going to be mechanically reliable. The trick on fuel economy has got to be to get it running on biodiesel :)

Techno Commander
28-06-2010, 00:45
Reliability on those should be excellent. Its a Volvo built to army spec. :)
Running on bio fuel is gonna be a little harder though. They have a detuned 6 cyl petrol engine. There is a conversion kit for fitting a Mercedes Sprinter engine though.

Spares are easily available and relatively cheap. Can even be obtained from Volvo main dealers (but you pay their prices though).

Some links if you are interested.

http://www.fmv4x4.com/en/?page_id=218

http://www.real4x4.com/Volvo303.shtml

http://www.volvoc303.co.uk/

Alex_UK
28-06-2010, 14:21
Nice one Andy, thanks for the further info on the M.A.N. - and that converted Volvo is just fab! (Wonder if they could be LPG'd?)

Sorry Frank, but your story didn't half make me laugh! I think he should count himself very luck he didn't get his head bashed in and a shallow grave for his trouble! As Marco says, your patience is amazing. From now on I think we will have to call you St. Frank!

Effem
28-06-2010, 17:25
Sorry Frank, but your story didn't half make me laugh! I think he should count himself very luck he didn't get his head bashed in and a shallow grave for his trouble! As Marco says, your patience is amazing. From now on I think we will have to call you St. Frank!

I haven't told the entire story, so let's see if I can make you laugh some more.

As I said, this lad would insist on eating McDonalds, so after the Le Mans fiasco I suggested the kids stock up on food that they WOULD eat, otherwise we were going to make forward progress around 10 miles per day. I was very fair in saying that at the next supermarket stock up they could choose exactly what they wanted to eat because I was Donald Duck'ed if I was searching for a McD 2 or 3 times a day for the rest of the holiday. Anyway, me and the woman stocked up on the usual bacon, eggs, bread, milk, etc., but when we reached the checkout we found daughter and boyfriend had come back with 5 bananas and around 10 packets of crisps. I said nothing.

After we landed at Calais, I turned North to head into Belgium to stock up on cigarettes because France is a funny place to buy ciggys if you are a smoker. I bought 2 cartons then with the intention of stocking up just before returning to England. Part of the journey was to go through Andorra before hitting Spain near Barcelona. Only stopped for one night in Andorra and walked around some town centre or other gazing in the shops. The prices were incredibly low because it is tax free of course, so the kids (Daughter aged 14, boyfriend aged 21) buy bottles of booze and cartons of ciggies. I pointed out several times that once at the Spanish border we probably would be clobbered by customs for duty, but their attitude was what does a silly old fart like me know about these things? Sure enough, at the Spanish border there was one heck of a queue to leave Andorra whereas on the way in there wasn't. We got pulled over and searched with a fine tooth comb and the customs man was smiling when he removed an armful of cigarette cartons and demanded either the duty or have it confiscated. I told him mine were bought in Belgium and he should look at the packet seals for proof, so he could whistle fro any duty from me. The kids had spent all their money buying the fags and had no money to pay the duty, so they waved goodbye to the lot. Sympathy from me? I'll leave you to guess how much sympathy I had.

Anyone who has been in Spain during August will know that flying pigs and rocking horse crap is easier to come by than space on a campsite, so every evening it was a stop-start trek from one campsite to the next trying to book a space but being turned away. We had reach Cape Trafalgar at around 5.00pm and I stopped at a site that said vacancies on the gate. Yippee. Went into reception and yes there was one place left, so open wallet, pay the man and smartly walk back to the 'van with site map in hand, mighty pleased with myself. Open door and daugher announces "We aint stoppin' 'ere". Errrrrm, why not? "Cos it aint got a swimmin' pool". "Aint got a feckin' ski slope or feckin' helipad either, but they have got a feckin' space for the feckin' night" thinks I. Grrrrrrrrrr. I had an instant Flashback to Planes, Trains and Automobiles when his rental car goes missing.

Daughter starts bawling, mother wades in and orders we move on. Between Cape Trafalgar and Cadiz there must have been at least 20 campsites and all of them were full. 6 hours later my navigator manages to get us lost in Cadiz city centre. Not entirely her fault because there were roadworks and diversions all over the place, but I am getting very tired, very hungry and as fine a city as Cadiz may be, I was getting pissed off with seeing it the fifth time around. It was knocking on for 2.00am now and I had more chance of swimming the Atlantic with Tower Bridge strapped to my back than finding a campsite with a vacancy. T'other side of Cadiz, I pulled off the motorway down a side road and found a layby because my eyelids were mighty heavy. Engine off, kettle on. Daughter says "Why are we stopping here?" I said I have no intention of driving another yard because I was exhausted and particularly so when 3 others have been snoring for the last hour behind me. "But I don't feel safe spending the night here" she whines. If I took her brain out and put a turd in there it would probably double her intelligence. I ignored her but mother says the same thing, so I pointed out the SAFEST place to spend the night was 9 hours ago and 100 or so miles behind us. Suddenly, this crisis has become MY fault. FFS! "Saint Frank" simply isn't big enough a title for what I had to go through then.

After I bunged matey boy out at Benalmedena, it was sulks, sulks and even more sulks from daughter. This little bitch could sulk for England at the Olympics. Reached Malaga that night and actually found a space at a campsite!!!! The place was packed. Each plot was fully occupied down the last millimeter and the streets in the campsite was packed with cars, so I had to do some deft steering wheel spinning and gear shifting to back into the allocated space, each side of which was lined with pollarded trees. I asked mother to look out on the nearside of the van and daughter to guide me in on the offside. Managed to avoid all the cars, got the back end of the van into the space, when I hear a very loud crunching noise. I look in my rear view mirror to see daughter staring at the ground with her hands in her pockets. In amongst the bushy foliage of the pollarded trees there was a branch which took an obvious dislike to my roofline and the roof lost the battle. Courtesy and politeness was not my top priority when I got out of the van to speak to daughter. Just then the heavens opened, the rain came down with a vengeance and I have a hole in the roof that needs attention. Luckily, I found a shop nearby that had some wide white tape which I hoped would stick enough to keep the rain out. That night was spent in silence.

The rain managed to plague me again the following night, not due to a hole in the roof either. Reached Almeria by evening time and found a campsite well away from the coast - seemed to be the best tactic. Nice big plot at the bottom of the site, with a vine covered canopy. Fabulous. No cars at all in the streets, so nice easy access. Backed in nice and slowly, looking in each mirror at my very attentive helpers. Suddenly, the images are moving up my driver's side mirror. Strange, thinks I. Take it out of reverse, into 1st gear and nothing i happening, I am not moving at all. Jumped out the door to see my rear wheel spinning in fresh air over a firkin great big hole where a patch of gravel used to be and the van resting on it's chassis over it. The hole must have been around four foot square by six feet deep, it had what looked like steel reinforcing bars supporting a few paving slabs with about 6 inches of soil and gravel chucked on top. The campsite owner said it must have been the rain that softened it up because there was a big motorcaravan parked in that space the night before and that was fine. Really? I got yanked out by a 4x4 and a length of chain and "Manuel" put a cone behind the 'van and walked away nonplussed. Of course, daughter starts panicking that Spain is going to open up for a 100 miles either side of this hole and we'll never see daylight again. If only.

Marco
28-06-2010, 17:52
Wonderful stuff, Frank. However, this bit was priceless:


If I took her brain out and put a turd in there it would probably double her intelligence.


Fuckin' hilarious!! :D :D :rofl: :rofl:

Marco.

Alex_UK
28-06-2010, 20:44
Oh my Christ, I fear a little bit of wee may have come out - luckily the weather is so warm I can't be 100% sure... Marco is spot on, that is the quote of the week, if not since well, ever!

Thanks for sharing, I hope it was at least a little bit cathartic! :lol:

Marco
28-06-2010, 20:51
Oh my Christ, I fear a little bit of wee may have come out - luckily the weather is so warm I can't be 100% sure...


Having already saturated a rather generous-sized adult nappy, I had to tie the ankles of my waterproof joggers to stem the tide!

Marco.

Techno Commander
28-06-2010, 21:54
Thats is brilliant. Totally made my day reading that. :lol::lol::lol:

Jonboy
28-06-2010, 21:55
Very well told love it, i have a caravan (perhaps i shouln't admit it though) just do weekends though, we have managed to get shot of the kids the last couple of trips, so if you "see my caravan a rockin don't come a knocking" :eyebrows: